


Sonic the Smart Hedgehog's Smart Life

by Angel_Duck_Tales_5



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog - All Media Types
Genre: Adventure, All-Around Silliness, Hilarity Ensues, Humor, Petty Rivals, Slice of Life, Smart Nonsense
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-14
Updated: 2019-12-22
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:40:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 27,485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21786892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angel_Duck_Tales_5/pseuds/Angel_Duck_Tales_5
Summary: Being some sort of a super smart person is pretty hectic, to say the least. Smart Sonic can definitely tell you that from experience. Dealing with petty rivals who just wants to show you up...trying to solve literally every problem that happens in this universe, even if it's dumb...and trying to endure all the general nonsense that happens to him and his friends. But hey, that's just a day in the life of Sonic the Smart Hedgehog and his friends.





	1. Pizza Party

**Author's Note:**

> Yup, prepare yourself for an utterly nonsensical story! I'm just going to let you fellow readers know that this is my most early work, so I hope you guys can cut me some slack. Although, I am still somewhat proud of it, to be honest. 
> 
> By the way, this version of Sonic and friends that you're seeing here are not the original versions. They are basically just smart versions of the originals...who also happened to be related to their respective counterparts. Go figure.
> 
> Anyways, without further ado, let's delve into the smart life!

I wake up to the morning glow. Morning already? I thought. I look at my Mario Kart 8 bed sheets. (Why do I have Mario bed sheets when I'm a fan of my cousin?)

Oh, I didn't explain myself. My name is Sonic the Smart Hedgehog! But you can call me Smart Sonic for short! (My simplistic nickname.) My cousin is the (in)famous Sonic the Hedgehog himself. He's pretty famous, but not in a good way. When Sonic 06 and Sonic Boom got released, he got infamous. The only thing to hope for him right now is Sonic Mania. If that doesn't work, well, his franchise is dead. Let's hope that doesn't happen.

Anyways, let's get back to me. I go to a school called Smart School. (Not the most creative name, but I'll let that go.) I go there with my smart friends who also had famous (or infamous) cousins. I'm smart, obviously. (Hence my name.) I know all the facts. (Even the complicated facts!) For example: A porcupine has about 30,000 quills.

Yep, I've still got it.

I have a backstory (who doesn't?) but I'm not going to talk about it right now. Why? Because I'll be late for school if I keep talking.

I got dressed, (I only put the glasses on) I had breakfast, (Corn Flakes, anyone?) and I waited outside for a bus. (Buses are so slow...) Smart Tails came a minute later.

I forgot to tell you that Smart Tails is my brother. He's smart too, but he likes to crack jokes. Especially at my expense.

"Hey, big bro," Tails said, "why does a smart chicken cross the road?" I groaned because he said that joke so many times that it's probably funny at the time cavemen told that joke.

"To get to the school." I answered. Smart Tails looked shocked at me as if i solved the cure for cancer. (There is a cure. Look it up.)

"How did you know that?" Tails asked. "Because you told this joke a million times." I answered. Geez, these jokes are getting older than my grandma! I thought.

At that time, the bus came. (Finally!) We climbed onto the bus. We sat in separate seats. Smart Tails sat in the seat next to Smart Amy, while I sat in the seat next to Smart Knuckles.

"Hey, Smart Sonic, what's up?" Knuckles said. "My brother told a same joke. Again." I answered.

You're probably wondering where my smart friends and I live. We live in Earth, while our infamous cousins live in the different planet called Mobius. I heard that this place is practically paradise. Maybe we'll visit them someday. (That is, if we get our own rocket. Which won't become reality until we grow up.)

Anyways, the bus stopped at the school. If you're wondering what it looks like, its exterior is all blue. But its interior is all colorful. In every different room, there's a different color. The math room is green. The language arts room is yellow. The reading room is blue. (My favorite class AND my favorite color!)

We got off the bus and walked to the lunchroom (which is red) for breakfast. (Yes, we eat breakfast at home AND at school. Double bonus!) During the walk there, we talked about stuff.

"So, we're going to have a pizza party at 5:00 PM. Whose house are we going to celebrate there?" Knuckles asked. I raised my hand. "My house." I said. "Ok, cool." Knuckles said.

At the lunchroom, we got in line with other people and looked at the breakfast menu that's on the wall.

"Breakfast pizza?" I said. You see, breakfast pizzas are circular pizzas with sausage and eggs on it. (Strange, because I hate eating eggs, yet I enjoy that pizza. Maybe there's something on that egg that makes it taste good?)

"Yeah." Tails said. "If you don't like it, don't eat it." "I do like it!" I said. Tails is so dumb sometimes.

"I'm going to have breakfast pizza and Cheerios." Knuckles said. "I'll have a orange, breakfast pizza, and waffles." Amy said. "I'll just have breakfast pizza." Tails said. "I'll eat everything, except eggs!" I said. Did I mention I'm a big eater?

"Really, Sonic?" Tails said. "What? I just hate eggs." I said. (Even though I'm having breakfast pizza.)

After we got and ate our breakfast, (Amy gave an orange to Knuckles, who grabbed and accidentally crushed it. Juices everywhere. Amy's reaction? "Yuck!") the bell rang. We walked to math class.

Let me just say that math is the hardest subject for me. I may be smart, but I have to use my brain a lot more because the math problems are so complicated. My friends are faster in answering these questions than me, and I don't know why. Anyways, our math teacher, Mrs. Becky, gave us a worksheet. It's about multiplying. Thank goodness. I'm the master when it comes to multiplication. After doing a few problems, (9 X 5= 45. 7 X 7= 49. 9 X 10= 90.) Knuckles whispers to me.

"Remember the pizza party." He said. "Don't worry, I remember." I whispered back.

In case you're wondering why Knuckles asked about my memory, well, I have selective memory. I choose to remember one thing, (pizza party) and I choose to NOT remember the other (math homework).

After math class is over, (I survived that class for now) we walked to science class. "Man, math class is brutal!" I said. "Not to us!" Tails, Knuckles, and Amy replied. "Whatever." I said. I hate math so much! I thought.

In science, (which is my other favorite subject, because I'm a pro when it comes to science) we learned about how the scientists do their job. They measure, experiment, and record events! After that class, I got so many answers right, they might as well call me "The Science Master".

"This is too easy!" I said. My friends groan because they're tired of me being proud about being good at science.

We walked to the shop class, (which is actually the construction class) and we learned how to read a tape measure. Which is WAY too simple, because I got a 100 on that measuring tape worksheet., along with everybody else.

After that, it's language arts. We learned about prefixes and suffixes. Nobody is dumb enough to fail that test.

Reading class is next. "YES!" I cheered. "Do you really have to shout, Sonic?" Tails asked. "YEP!" I cried out.

After reading about foods from different cultures, (spaghetti from Italy is my favorite) we had to write about that story. That's my least favorite part, but whatever.

After that, it's math. Again. Remember about math at first period? Well, the first period is about Pre-Algebra. This math class is Intensive Math. It's more complicated than the first one. I often struggle in that class. But after I (somehow) got a 100 on my Least Common Multiple worksheet, I survived that class also.

Finally, social studies is next. We learned about Nomads and how they travel around the world. (Pretty interesting if you ask me.)

After that, it's time to go home. After that long bus ride to home, (I hate buses now) Tails and I went inside our house.

I went upstairs to my room. I got out my trusty phone and recorded the latest adventures of my plushies. I uploaded that video to YouTube. (The latest video is about Lion stopping Elmo from brainwashing Penguino.)

Oh, one last thing about me: I'm a YouTuber. I make plushie videos, but I occasionally make gaming and reaction videos too. I have 66 subscribers at the time. I wish to be a famous, smart YouTuber someday, but for now, I have to work for it. I also enjoy making people laugh with my funny videos.

Anyways, it's 5:00 PM, and I heard a doorbell. I answered the door. Knuckles and Amy stands at my doorway. "Hey." I said. "Hello!" Amy said. "What's up?" Knuckles said.

"Ready to get this pizza party started?" I said. "We're ready!" Knuckles said as he carries the pizza inside.

I opened one of them and I made a disgusted face as I discover that Knuckles ordered onion pizzas. I HATE onions.

Luckily, there's a second pizza box, which is pepperoni. I sighed happily because pepperoni is my favorite.

We ate pizzas and had crazy conversations as time passes. ("Wanna hear about the time my grandma punched my face to say "I love you"? We stared at Knuckles awkwardly. "I think that's called tough love." I said.) For some reason though, Tails looks scared. I wonder why.

When it's 9:00 PM, Tails screamed. "MOMMY!" He cried out. "Whoa, what's going on, Tails?" I said. "If you have pizza party at 9:00 PM, the pizzas will come alive and devour you!" Tails shouted.

"But didn't we eat all the pizzas? I know that because Knuckles' breath is stinky from eating onion pizzas." I said. "HEY!" Knuckles shouted. "Hey, I'm just stating the facts." I said.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang. I answered the door. It's the pizza employee who hates life. I'll give support for him later, but for now, I wonder what's going on. "What's with the extra pizzas?" I said. "You won free pizzas for ordering the pepperoni and onion pizzas on September 1st, 2016. Whatever." The pizza employee explained. "Well, that was strangely specific, but thanks!" I said. "Whatever." The pizza employee said. After that conversation, I brought the pizzas to my friends. This is really outlandish! I thought. "What's the topping of the pizza?" Knuckles asked after I brought them in. "I'm guessing it's pepperoni." I said. "NO! IT'S GOING TO BE ONIONS!" Knuckles shouted.

While Knuckles and I were arguing, the pizza box slowly opened by itself. Tails and Amy gasped. "IT'S THE ATTACK OF THE ONION PIZZAS!" Tails and Amy screamed.

"See? Told you." Knuckles said. I'll settle that argument later. For now, it's about to eat Tails!

I have to do something fast. Luckily, I have an idea. This idea always works with enemies.

"What's 9 + 10?" I asked. The pizza stopped moving and started to think. Then it answered. What's its answer? "21!" "You are so stupid." I remarked. The pizzas suddenly became weak. Except for the 8th pizza. It must be the pizza leader.

We ate the weak pizzas (except me) and they screamed. "Tell my mom that I love her!" One of the pizzas said. Do pizzas have moms? Scratch that question. I thought.

The leader pizza suddenly became big. It must be the sauce. It devoured Knuckles. "NO! I HAVEN'T FINISHED THE ARGUMENT YET!" Knuckles shouted. Serves him right.

It devoured Tails next. "NO! I HAVEN'T GOTTEN TOGETHER WITH CREAM!" Tails shouted. Tails has a crush on Cream? How interesting. I thought.

Amy got devoured next. "NO! I HAVEN'T MADE A CONFESSION TO AMY YET!" I screamed. I never thought that I'll say it.

Now it's just me and the leader pizza. I'll admit: I'm a bit scared of this pizza. Why? Because it has onions on it! I don't like to eat onions! Looks like I have to conquer my dislike. First, let's use my smart trick.

"What is Walt Disney afraid of?" I asked.

The pizza thought about that question. "Ducks?" The pizza leader guessed.

"Nope! It's mice!" I said. The pizza leader got weakened now. Now it's time to conquer my dislike! How? By eating the pizza leader!

I jumped and chomped on the pizza leader. "NOOO!" The pizza leader screamed.

"Hey! It's actually pretty good!" I said. I'm surprised that I suddenly like onions. Maybe it's the sour taste. I like that.

I chomped until the pizza leader fell down. It's making cheese bubbles...

OH NO! It'S GOING TO EXPLODE!

BOOM!

My friends and I are now covered in cheese. I wiped some cheese off my arms. My friends got up and wiped some cheese off themselves.

"You know, I agree with you, Knuckles. Onions are pretty good." I said. "YES! FINALLY, SOMEONE AGREES WITH ME!" Knuckles shouted.

I sighed. It doesn't matter now. We defeated the living pizzas and saved ourselves. A pretty strange, but interesting adventure, if you ask me.

I smelled my breath. "Ugh! Looks like I have to brush my teeth once I go upstairs!" I said. "I don't need to brush my teeth!" Knuckles said. "EWW!" Amy, Tails, and I shouted.

"Well, I learned my lesson! The lesson is, you don't really need to dislike your food. If you try it, maybe you might like it!" I said.

Tails elbows me in the arm. "Oh yeah, I also learned to not have pizza parties at 9:00 PM!" I added.

"That's the lesson!" Tails said.

"Yup. It's the lesson I'll never forget." I said.


	2. Birthday Bash

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Today is Smart Sonic's birthday! Witness as he and his friends mess around with each other while playing party games and then... What's this? They haven't brought presents for him yet? Welp, time to go shopping for gifts!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Annnnnd this is where petty rivalry comes in. Thanks a lot, Smart Shadow. XD

I woke up to the great smell. It's the smell of...pancakes? That's pretty rare. Nobody ever makes pancakes for breakfast in my house!

I went downstairs and found Tails flipping pancakes on a stove. I'm pleasantly surprised.

"Tails?" I said. Tails turned to me, surprised. "What are you doing?" I asked. "I'm making a pre-birthday breakfast!" Tails answered. "Pre-birthday breakfast?" I said.

"Your birthday's not until tomorrow." Tails said. Outside, I'm surprised. Inside, I'm a little disappointed. I'm a little forgetful so I forget important events easily. That is a hindrance sometimes.

No way! Tails just got done cooking pancakes! He served 3 big pancakes to me on a gold plate (who knows where he got that gold plate from), and he bowed to me. "Bon apptite!" Tails said in a VERY bad French accent. I don't blame him. If someone's birthday is close, I'll probably use a bad French accent too.

I took the gold plate and a gold fork (hey, just because my birthday is close doesn't mean I can't have fancy things), and ate 3 pancakes without any more interruptions. Man, it tastes so good with its buttery flavor.

"Hey, Tails, you've really outdone yourself with this pre-birthday breakfast! What did you put in those pancakes?" I inquired. "I put milk, butter, and garlic!" Tails answered.

I did a double take. I looked at Tails, shocked. I tasted my breath. I coughed. HARD. My breath is so nasty because of this dumb garlic! Luckily, I didn't brush my teeth before breakfast, so I have a chance to clean out my bad breath. I ran upstairs. "Are you mortified?" Tails asked.

Obviously. I thought. I went to the bathroom. I took out the toothbrush and the toothpaste. I brushed my teeth for 5 minutes. (Hey, brushing your teeth for 5 minutes gets you clean teeth. Plus, my breath is that bad.)

After that, I ran back downstairs. Unfortunately, the bus is on the side of the bus stop! And Tails got on a bus already! I opened a door and ran out to catch the bus.

Luckily, I did. That's a lucky break if I ever saw one. I got on a bus. The bus driver looks pretty angry. "WHY THE HECK ARE YOU SO LATE?!" The bus driver screamed. Let me tell you, it's one thing to be almost late to the bus, it's another thing to get yelled at by a bus driver. Not a pleasant way to start the morning.

After that fiasco, I sat next to Knuckles. I don't want to sit next to Tails because he's the one who made it happen! The Pancake Fiasco, I mean. Do you ever want to sit next to someone who got you in trouble? Yeah, I thought so.

"Dude, what just happened?" Knuckles asked. I told Knuckles the whole story. Needless to say, I think I made Knuckles' day great. "HAHAHAHAHA!" Knuckles laughed. LOUDLY. My goodness, why do loud stuff always happen?

"Laugh it up, Chuckles." I said. Tails snickers. "Nice pun there, Sonic!" Tails said. I smirked. Knuckles look like as if he just got tased. "BURN!" I exclaimed.

"SHUT UP!" Knuckles and the bus driver said at the same time. Two loud people shouting at the same time. Isn't that peaceful? No, it isn't.

"Don't worry, Sonic. Your day will get better. You have one thing to look forward to tomorrow." Amy said. Did I mention Amy is a nice person?

"My birthday?" I asked. "Yep!" Amy answered. I looked outside the window of the bus. I hope this day gets better. I thought.

After the bus arrived and we got off the bus, we had a usual conversation while we're walking to the lunchroom. The conversations usually get started by Knuckles.

"So, I heard tomorrow's your special day, Birthday Boy!" Knuckles teased. "It sure is." I answered nonchalantly. "How old are you going to be tomorrow, Sonic?" Tails asked. "15." I replied. That's right. I'm turning 15 tomorrow. That sounds like an awesome age to me. Unfortunately, that's the same age my (in)famous cousin Sonic the Hedgehog had when he went through Sonic 2006. In fact, that's where he first got infamous!

Pretty horrifying thought, huh? I wonder if people will tease me if I turn 15. Tails and Knuckles pretty much made me go through the worst morning ever. Amy is the only person who's genuinely nice to me.

After we got to lunchroom and had breakfast (cereal and crackers that you dip it into peanut butter), we went to math class. When we got there and sat down in our seats, we heard the announcements.

It's the usual lunch menu and quiz announcements, but one special announcement caught my ear. (I would say the special announcement caught my eye...but it came through the PA, so we had to use our ears in order to hear any announcements.)

"People who signed up for driving class should go to Mr. Connors' science classroom!"

Let me fill you in on what the driving class is about and why it made me interested. You see, the driving class doesn't involve actual driving. (Because you obviously need to be 16 in order to get a driving test. Duh.) It's just one teacher teaching you about the rules of the road.

A month ago, I signed up for a driving class. They have interesting topics in the driving class. That's why I'm interested when I heard that special announcement.

"See you later, guys!" I said to my friends. They didn't sign up for driving class. Tails can fly, Knuckles can glide, and Amy... I don't know about Amy. Maybe her hammer can take her places.

Anyway, I walked to the science room. "Hey, Sonic!" Mr. Connors said. Don't ask me why he said "Hey, Sonic!" Maybe he always uses the Internet.

"Hey." I said back. I looked around the room. There's a few students here like Marine, Manic, Shadow, Silver...

Wait, what?! SHADOW?! WHAT IS HE DOING HERE?!

"Shadow? What are you doing here?" I asked. "I'm here to learn about driving. But since you're here, I'm here to do better at driving class than you!" Shadow sneered.

Of course. Shadow always likes to brag about grades. News flash, Shadow: Nobody likes to hear other people brag about grades. It's actually really pathetic. I wonder if my cousin ever had to deal with Shadow's cousin.

"Whatever, Shadow." I said. Not the greatest comeback at the moment, but it's the best I can do for now.

Man, I hate Shadow so much. Why is he so full of himself? I thought.

Shadow remained silent. That's a first. I like to keep it that way.

Mr. Connors showed the slideshow that is all about driving. I wrote some notes on it. I glanced at Shadow. He's writing down the notes too. Of course. I thought.

After the slideshow, Mr Connors gave us booklets. "You should write down what you learned there!" He said.

I opened the booklet. I wrote everything I have learned here. Obviously, Shadow did too.

After we're done writing them down, we hand the booklets to Mr. Connors. "Both of you get a 100!" Mr. Connors exclaimed.

Shadow and I narrowed our eyes at each other. This score didn't settle the differences. The score has to be different. If the score is the same, that won't settle anything and we knew it.

After driving class, I went to Social Studies, which is my last class period of the day. (That's one good thing about driving class. You'll be there almost the whole day. So that's a free pass.)

I sat down at the table with my friends. "How's driving class?" Knuckles asked. "It's not bad." I answered. "The only bad thing is Shadow." "Let me guess. He bragged about his grades again." Tails said. "Yep." I said.

After Social Studies, it's time to go home. I sat with Amy, and Tails sat with Knuckles. We always have conversations on a ride home too.

"Man, Shadow should learn how to be a good sport." I said. "Yeah! Being smart isn't going to get you far in life!" Tails said. "What are you guys talking about? You're both smart!" Knuckles said. "We're all smart." Amy said.

We stared at Amy. "What?" Amy said. The whole bus ride was silent after that.

The bus stopped. Tails and I got off the bus. "Bye!" Tails and I said to Knuckles and Amy.

After that, I went inside while Tails get mail. I went upstairs and checked my YouTube channel. I have 103 subscribers now. Despite not making videos for a while, people still have faith in me. I'm very shocked.

After that, I played games. Super Paper Mario is a very interesting game. The story really stands out here.

I noticed that night came fast. I need to sleep in order to celebrate my birthday with energy tomorrow. I went to my bed and slept.

I dreamed that I have a very bad birthday. Why? My friends made fun of me. They throw cupcakes at me. In other words, I'm getting bullied on my birthday. Worst. Dream. EVER!

I woke up in a middle of the night. I looked around. Nothing bad here. I went back to sleep. I didn't have any more dreams after that.

When I woke up on Saturday, (which is my birthday) I feel excited. "All right! I can't wait for my birthday to start!" I exclaimed.

"Did someone say birthday?" Tails said. He walked into my room with a tray. It has food on it. Well, breakfast food, to be specific.

"Please enjoy this wonderful breakfast in bed! And don't worry, there's no garlic this time." Tails said. I looked suspiciously at Tails because he put garlic in my pancakes yesterday, but I decided to eat my breakfast anyway. There's sausages, scrambled eggs, and bacon.

"Umm, Tails, do you even know I hate eggs?" I said. "Oops, sorry. I'll eat the eggs." Tails said. I reached for my fork and ate my sausages and bacon.

After that, we have some time to play before Knuckles and Amy comes to our house. Tails and I decided to play New Super Mario Bros. Wii. I played as Mario and Tails played as Luigi. After a few levels (at one level, Mario jumped on Luigi while Luigi is jumping over a pit, causing Luigi to fall to his death and Tails to be enraged at me), we heard a doorbell. "I'll get it!" I said.

I answered the door. "Hey guys!" I said to Knuckles and Amy. "What's up?" Knuckles said. "Hey." Amy said.

After the introduction, I asked them a question. "Did you bring presents?" I asked. "No, but we're going to a mall to buy stuff that you want." Amy said. "Also, what kind of question is that?" Knuckles said. "Sorry guys. I just can't wait for my birthday to get started!" I added sheepishly.

"Let's do party games!" Tails said. Okay. That sounds fun.

"So... what party games are we gonna do first?" I asked. "We're playing Guess Who! One person gives out details about a particular person to others! The other people guess someone based on the details!" Tails explained. "That sounds easy!" I said. "It's not going to be easy with me around!" Knuckles said. "I'll do my best!" Amy said.

Thus, the game started. Tails went first to describe details.

"Okay, here's some details on that particular person! He's always going around asking people if they are the traitor. That sounds stupid, if you ask me. Can you guess who that is?" That's pretty easy. I have played Sonic 06 before. This is a really easy question. I raised my hand. "That's easy. It's Silver." I said. "I think it's Bart Simpson!" Knuckles guessed. "It's Mario. No doubt." Amy said. "The correct answer is... Silver! Congratulations, Sonic!" Tails said. That's a very obvious question. How come my friends never got that?

Anyways, it's Knuckles turn to give out details. "Okay, this guy is really dumb and he lives under a rock!" Knuckles said. "Umm... you?" I guessed. "NO! I LIVE IN A NORMAL HOUSE!" Knuckles shouted. "The answer is Sonic! He has always lived under a rock. He has never heard of the latest memes! He has never heard of the "Grand Dad" meme!" Amy said. "HEY! AT LEAST I KNOW ALL THE SMART FACTS!" I shouted. "The answer is Patrick Star! He's stupid AND he literally lives under a rock!" Tails said. "Correct! Congratulations, Tails!" Knuckles said. Tails watches cartoons. No wonder because he once whined that Teen Titans Go is canceled. Needless to say, I'm speechless.

Next, it's Amy's turn. "Okay, this person does sweet ninja moves and he uses Shadow Clone Jutsu." Amy said. "I think that's Shadow." I said. "I think that's Naruto!" Knuckles said. "I think that's... Yeah, I got nothing." Tails said. "The answer is... Naruto! Congratulations, Knuckles!" Amy said. Does Amy watch anime? She probably does since she gave out this kind of question.

Last but not least, it's my turn. "Okay, this guy is the one who really makes me angry. He likes to brag about grades." I said. "It's Shadow." Amy, Knuckles, and Tails said. They are not surprised about this. Probably because of how much I said about hating on Shadow. "Correct." I said with a huff.

Let's see the results. Knuckles and Tails are tied at 2 points while Amy and I are tied at 1 point. "Knuckles and Tails are the winner!" Amy said. "Yeah." I said, feeling disappointed. "Don't feel bad about yourself." Amy said kindly. "Thanks." I said.

After that, we heard the doorbell. I answered the door. SHADOW AND SILVER?! "Hey." I said to Shadow and Silver.

"Hey." Silver said. "What's up, rival?" Shadow said. Outside, I'm calm. Inside, I'm raging.

"Come on in! Actually, let's go to the mall." I said. "Okay?" Shadow and Silver said. The thing is, I refuse to let Shadow inside my personal comfort zone and I don't think I can trust his friend either.

"Guys! Let's go to the mall!" I called over. After that little introduction, we walked to the mall.

We saw the sign in front of the mall that said "50% off on everything in this mall!" "Sounds like a good deal." I said. Everyone agreed.

After that, we searched for a (cheap) birthday gift. I look at books. Tails looks at any cool gadgets. Knuckles looked at video games. Amy looked at movies. Shadow went to the prank shop. Silver went to... the food court. Real helpful, Silver.

At the book store, I look at the middle school books section. The slice of life books are the kinds of books I like. When I saw "Middle School: Just my Rotten Luck", I grabbed it and paid for it. This book looks like an interesting read, to be honest.

Tails is at a phone store, looking for a new phone. He saw some cheap phones and gagged. "I really hate those kinds of phones!" He said. He found the iPhone 6. "Now, those kinds of phones I like!" Tails exclaimed happily. "This is way too easy!"

Knuckles is at GameStop. He looked around any games that might be enjoyable to play. He found Mario and Sonic at the Rio 2016 Olympic Games. That game is very fun, but Knuckles noticed Mario Kart 8 next to it. He's trying to decide if he wants to make me happy or livid. After a few minutes, he decided that he wanted to make me livid. He paid for Mario Kart 8. "I can't wait to see his reaction!" Knuckles said.

Amy is at Blockbuster. She's trying to find the perfect movie. "I hope Sonic likes romantic comedies!" Amy said. She took out the note that I wrote for her that said, "No romantic comedies or any mushy, gushy stuff!" "That's so unfair!" Amy said. Sighing, Amy decides to get The Peanuts Movie. "I hope he likes it!" Amy said.

Shadow is at some prank shop. "Where is that thing that Sonic is always afraid of?" Shadow asked. He ran around the store until he found a jar full of fake spiders. "AHA! There it is! I hope Sonic likes this prank!" Shadow said.

Silver is at some food court. "Where's the perfect birthday food?" Silver asked. He found a booth that sells cupcakes and he walks... past it, and went to the pizza booth. "2 pepperoni pizzas, please!" Silver ordered.

After the hunt for birthday presents, we got out of the mall and went to my house. Welp, it seems I let Shadow and his friend into my comfort spot anyway. I must have been blinded by my love of gifts to notice. "This is going to be THE most awesome birthday party ever!" I exclaimed with excitement. Everyone agreed.

When we got home, we sat down at the huge table. "I also got you some cake at some bakery!" Amy said. "Nice." I said.

They took out my birthday presents, which are gift wrapped. (Somehow.)

"I found this interesting book!" I said. I took the book out of my shopping bag. I opened the book. "Let me read the first paragraph!"

Ever since I've known you-how long has it been now?-I've been getting my butt kicked in about a hundred different ways. Well, the butt-kicking officially stops here.

"Wow! I already got interested in this book! I knew it's an interesting read!" I exclaimed happily. "What did you guys get me?"

"We must sing happy birthday first!" Tails said. "Alright, fine." I said. We sang happy birthday.

After that, we ate cake and had interesting conversations. (Shadow and Silver talked about Shadow's life with his mother, who is really harsh to Shadow. Maybe that's why Shadow is so angry towards me. He has a really harsh mother while I don't have my mother with me, who is living with my cousin on Mobius.)

Finally, it's time to open presents! I opened the first one. It's the iPhone 6! I always wanted to have one of those! "It's a very good phone compared to the cheap ones!" Tails said. I thanked Tails.

The next present is Mario Kart 8. What is this game doing here?! "HAHA! Your reaction is so funny! This game is actually fun though. I recommend that you try it." Knuckles said. I thanked Knuckles by punching him in the arm.

The next present is The Peanuts Movie. I gasped. I always wanted to see that movie! The movie theaters aren't cheap and some people never bother putting this movie on some movie website. That is why I'm pleasantly surprised. "I knew you will like it!" Amy said. I thanked Amy by hugging her.

The next present is mysterious. I unwrapped it and it showed...SPIDERS! OH NO! WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?! "Relax, genius. These spiders aren't real. They are remote-controlled." Shadow said. I thanked Shadow by shouting at him.

The next present is...pizza? "I knew you will like it!" Silver said. "Umm... You do know we can get pizza at literally every other day, right?" I said. "Oops. Sorry about that." Silver said.

Knuckles gave me a cupcake with 15 candles on it. "Make your wish!" Knuckles said.

Hmm... What can I wish for? I thought. Well, I wish my friends will be more supportive...and I also wish that we can somehow travel to Mobius.

I blew out the candles. My friends cheered. Even Shadow! After that, it's time for my friends to go home. "Bye, Sonic! I hope you had fun at your birthday party!" My friends (except Shadow) said. "Thanks!" I said.

After that, they walked back home. I took my new presents to my room and played with them. I played with my phone and I got the Discord app, which is the app for true gamers to chat.

I played Mario Kart 8. I had some ups and downs while playing this game, mostly downs. But I have to admit: This game is actually fun. It's kind of addicting, too.

I watched The Peanuts Movie. This movie really likes to bring back the classics. I enjoyed watching it.

The remote-controlled spiders are actually fun to use. I pranked Tails with them while he's using the bathroom. Let me just say, he is not amused.

I ate some pizza. It's really delicious. That's all I have to say about it.

I had lots fun with my presents, but I feel really tired. It's 10:00 PM! Time to go to sleep. I went to my bed and sleep.

Man, this is the most awesome birthday party I have ever had! I thought. Good night...


	3. Mario Kart 8 Madness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smart Sonic ends up impulsively accepting the bet of a strange man that he had met online and now he's gotta beat him at Mario Kart 8! Otherwise, endless humiliation will ensue for him. Gosh, how does he keep getting into situations like this?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of my nonsensical opinions about Mario Kart 8 and Discord may or may not appear in this chapter.

It's been months since I played this game that needs some improvements. That game is called Mario Kart 8. Ever since I played this game, I feel nothing but frustration. Knuckles brought this game as a birthday gift just to mess with me. Unfortunately, that plan is working because I feel really frustrated at this game! Well, then... let's start at the beginning.

Ever since I got the Discord app on my phone. I joined the group that is obsessed with 200cc, which is the fastest engine class in Mario Kart 8. Too fast, in fact. You'll end up crashing into walls and falling off the roads easily because of this fast engine class.

After I fell off the road yet again, I screamed. "OH MY GOD!" I yelled. You see how frustrating this engine class is? Smart Tails runs up the stairs so fast that you'll actually confuse him with my (in)famous cousin, Sonic the Hedgehog. "Sonic, stop screaming and yelling! You're going to break all this glass in this house if you keep screaming! Man, what is up with you?" Tails said angrily. "Dude, I don't sing opera, which breaks all the glass in this house EASILY. You better thank me for that. Also, I'm getting frustrated by 200cc." I answered. "Again?! Geez, you should control your anger!" Tails yelled. He stomps off to his room to make another one of his failed inventions.

I paused the game to take a break from this madness. I turned on my phone and opened Discord. I looked at the 200cc group's general chat. There's one fellow named Waluigi who said, "Geez, I can't believe I got hit by a red shell again." You see, you can actually talk to people from other worlds in Discord, which is amazing. Isn't technology great?

I texted back, "You better believe it, Waluigi. It seems that the red shells love you. Maybe you should marry it." Yeah, I can get immature at times, but then again, who hasn't?

Waluigi texted his response. "At least the blue shells don't love me. I heard you guys had a nice honeymoon back at the Sweet Sweet Canyon course." OH NO, HE DID NOT JUST GO THERE. Not to mention that he added the wink emoji at the end of that sentence.

I tried not to think about that too much as I texted, "BRUH. YOU WANNA TAKE THIS TO THE VOICE CHAT?!" Yes, I am very infuriated that I might be the first living teapot. (Well, not really the first. You guys have seen Beauty and the Beast. I have never seen so much living kitchen utensils in my entire life.)

"OH HECK YES!" Waluigi texted back. Here's a thing about Waluigi. He seems to yell out for absolutely no reason other than being annoying. This guy is rarely angry too, so he's definitely yelling for no reason. It makes me wonder if he's secretly a little kid who got stuck in an adult body.

I opened up the voice chat and Waluigi joined shortly after. "IT'S WALUIGI TIME!" Waluigi yelled. "Dude, seriously?! You don't need to announce yourself like that!" I exclaimed. "But I have to! It's in my JOB DESCRIPTION!" Waluigi said. "Dude, I doubt that 'yelling like an idiot' is in your job description. Heck, you barely have a job description because you're just a spin-off character!" I answered. Okay, I admit, that was the best roast I came up with in my whole life. "Ooh! BURN!" Tails said from the other room. See? Even Tails agrees.

Waluigi sounds enraged at this. "Grr, I'll get you next time, Smart Sonic!" Waluigi screamed, like a little girl, I might add. "Well, I'll see you later, crybaby." I said. Just as I was about to end the voice chat, Waluigi suddenly screamed, "STOP!" Let me tell you, that scared me a lot more than the time I almost got a zero on the math test. (That math test was nearly impossible!)

"It's not over yet, smart guy! I challenge you to 3 races at Mario Kart 8! The challenge starts at 12:00 PM, which is noon!" Waluigi said. And the grass is green, Captain Obvious. I thought. "Whoever wins 2 out of 3 races is the winner! Also, the loser gets to be made fun of in the 200cc server for the month! By the way, did I mention that this challenge will have the 200cc engine class speed?!" Waluigi continued.

"Okay, I accept your challenge!" I said. "GOOD!" Waluigi yelled. "I'LL SEE YOU LATER, LOSER!" Whatever. You're just a spin-off character, so you're no threat to me anyway. I thought as I ended the voice chat. As soon as I did that though, I came to a realization. Wait a minute... Waluigi said that this challenge includes the 200cc engine class...and I stink horribly at this engine class... Oh shoot. "OH COME ON!" I screamed. I heard one crashing glass sound in my room and I looked at my handheld mirror on my desk, which had broken into pieces. Okay, so my voice is a little high. It's still not an opera voice because if it was, every glass in the house would break into a million pieces.

"Smart Sonic, I think you better practice." Tails said. "Okay. I'm gonna need support though, so can you please invite my friends?" I asked. "Alright, if that makes you feel any better." Tails answered with an eye roll. He opened up his communicator (the communicator is like a cell phone built specifically for Tails) and called Amy first. "Wow, Smart Sonic is actually racing against some mean guy in a racing video game?" Amy asked. She sounded surprised at this. She probably thought that I wouldn't have gotten myself into this situation.

"Yeah. You perfectly summed it up, Amy." Tails said. He called Knuckles next. "HAHAHAHA! I knew something like this would happen!" Knuckles laughed so much that he sounded like a wheezing donkey. Tails ended the call right then and there, thankfully. He called Shadow last. "Well then... I guess I'll see how my academic rival is doing. I bet the old man that no one cares about will beat Smart Sonic." Shadow said. On the outside, I was steaming because I actually can't believe that SHADOW (who's supposed to be as smart as me) of all people would think that some NOBODY would beat ME in a racing video game. But on the inside, I was chuckling because Shadow knew Waluigi's 'spin-off character' status. "Okay, tell the others to meet us at our house at 11:55 AM." Tails said. "Okay, I'll do that since I'm one of the fastest guys ever." Yeah, right. I thought. I'm pretty sure Shadow was smirking during that call.

After that call, I sighed. This challenge is making me nervous. If I fail, I'll end up getting a month of humiliation. And that's a nightmare if you ask me. This is (probably) the hugest risk I have ever taken in my life.

After a few hours, I hear knocking on my front door. Tails answered it and I hear the introductions and a few conversations. ("Hey, did you know that my mother puts mayonnaise on my macaroni and cheese to tell me that I need to shave?" Knuckles said. I'm pretty sure everyone looked like as if they just witnessed someone throwing up in a taco eating contest.)

I hear them coming up the stairs and they went inside my room. "Hi, guys." I said. Then I noticed a few things. One, I noticed that Knuckles has a bucket of popcorn with him. I guess that Knuckles loves to taste the salt and butter of my possible failure. Two, Shadow has a camera with him. He wants to record this whole challenge and possibly upload it to YouTube! If I failed, my humiliation is going to be taken up a notch with mean comments! And last but not least, Amy is wearing black clothes. That doesn't seem like much, but think about that for a minute. What tragic event also has people wearing black clothes? A funeral, that's what. In this case, it's my dignity's funeral.

I tried not to let all of this get to me. Then I noticed that it's 11:59 AM and screamed. It's almost time! Also, Shadow is angry because I startled him with my screaming. ("Geez, Smart Sonic! Why did you scream so much? Are you a man or a mouse?!" Shadow shouted. "Umm... a smart hedgehog." I answered.)

I turned on my Wii U and started up Mario Kart 8. I also opened up Discord on my phone and opened up the voice chat. Waluigi joined as soon as I started that voice chat. "WAHAHAHA! IT'S WALUIGI TIME!" Waluigi shouted. What an egomaniac. I thought. "Waluigi, would a simple hello kill you?" I asked incredulously. "...Yes." Waluigi said. "Shut up, you lousy liar!" I said. At this point, the title screen of Mario Kart 8 came into view on my TV. I pressed start and I chose the online mode. (The one player online mode, mind you. I gotta do this challenge by myself. "Why?" Tails asks. "Because I don't need you guys screwing this up!" I shouted. Tails looks pretty shaken up after that.)

Unfortunately, I got a sudden network error that sends me back to the main menu. (Shadow was recording at this point, so he said, "Oh come on! Why, error, why?! No one wants to watch a video about menus!")

Fortunately, the error is gone the second time I started the online mode. Once I got on a character select screen, Waluigi chose...Waluigi. (Of course he'll pick himself. He loves himself WAY too much...) I chose...Mario. (So much irony...) The reason I chose Mario is because he's a well-balanced character. He could be a useful character in a long run.

Waluigi and I agreed (for once) that the first race should be held at Ice Ice Outpost. It seems like a nice (albeit cold) place to have a first race. "I'M GOING TO BEAT YOU EASILY AT THIS!" Waluigi shouted. He's too confident for his own good. I ignored him.

When the countdown started, I held the A button absentmindedly. When the countdown ended, I ended up spinning out in place while Waluigi got a lucky head start. I guess I'm that nervous. After that little fiasco, I started to move and gradually gaining speed. I got the first item box and I got the banana item. I see Waluigi ahead and I decided to throw a banana peel at him. It missed him and Waluigi cackled like a witch. "HAHAHAHA! THAT WAS CLOSE, BUT NO BANANA!" Waluigi said. I cringed at that horrible pun. Because there is a banana. It just missed him.

After some time, I got an another item box and it revealed itself to be a red shell. "Yes! Just what I needed!" I said. Then I blinked. I'm starting to sound like Mario for a second there. I shook my head and threw my red shell at him. Unfortunately, he took out a banana at the last second and put it behind him. The red shell hits the banana and and both of the items disappear. "Oh man!" I exclaimed.

At the 2nd lap, I got close to Waluigi and drifted close to the wall. I tried to drift away from it, but it was too late. Waluigi pushed me to the wall and I bumped into it and I slowed down drastically after that. Waluigi laughed like a wheezing donkey, but coughed hard. Maybe he's secretly brothers with Knuckles...

At the final lap, I was at the homestretch with Waluigi STILL ahead of me. I got the item box near the wall. Please let me get a good item, please let me get a good item, please let me get a good item...

A blue shell! That's more than good! 

Immediately, I threw a blue shell and it blasted Waluigi up into the air briefly while he's near the air. I sped past him while he's in the air. "Hope you have a nice honeymoon!" I said. "GRR! I'LL GET REVENGE ON YOU IN THE NEXT RACE!" Waluigi screamed. I doubt that. Smart Sonic: 1! Waluigi: 0! I thought.

Waluigi and I agreed (Again? Well, strange things sometimes happen twice) that the second race should be held at Sunshine Airport, which is my favorite course. "I'm pretty sure I'm going to win this one!" I said in a confident manner. "WE'LL SEE ABOUT THAT!" Waluigi screamed. I swear, screaming is the only language he knew. "I'M GOING TO KICK YOUR..."

FUN FACT #1: The first toy advertised on television was Mr. Potato Head. That means the Mr. Potato Head fans (if there are any) are going to squeal about this fact. Well, that, and the TV fans too.

"...LITTLE BUTT!" Waluigi shouted. "Wow. For a second there, I thought he's going to say something vulgar." Tails said. Everyone else nodded in agreement.

This time, I got a boost when the countdown ended. Unfortunately, so did Waluigi. "WAHAHAHA! YOU THINK I'M GOING TO MESS UP THE COUNTDOWN BOOST?! THINK AGAIN! I HAVE PERFECT TIMING! I'LL NEVER MESS IT UP!" Waluigi shouted. Are his lungs ever going to get tired from shouting so much?

At the first lap, I got the item box first and I took out the banana and stayed ahead of Waluigi. Waluigi took out a green shell and tries to throw it at me, but he missed and threw it at the wall and bounced back and hit himself instead. "OW! MY LEG!" Waluigi said. Umm, isn't his legs in the KART? What he just said made no sense.

At the 2nd lap, I ended up crashing into a wall because I was going too fast and Waluigi ended up speeding past me. I really hate 200cc's unnecessary speed boost. I growled in frustration and tried to catch up to him.

Final lap and things get even more worse. I had a lightning bolt in my hand, ready to zap Waluigi senseless and Waluigi used the star at the last second, which made him invincible and faster. The zap didn't mean anything to him now. Waluigi passed the finish line first shortly after that. "SEE?! I TOLD YOU THAT I CAN KICK YOUR SCRAWNY LITTLE BUTT!" He said. I groaned. I can't believe he beat me easily. At my favorite course, no less! I thought begrudgingly. Waluigi laughed the whole time.

"HAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHA!" Waluigi laughed. LOUDLY. "You know, the old man that no one cares about could be a great replacement for Chewbacca." Shadow said. I chuckled, along with everyone else except Waluigi. "GRRR! SHUT YOUR LITTLE..."

FUN FACT #2: The longest non-talking film ever made was Andy Warhol's Sleep. It consists solely of a man sleeping for 8 hours. Frankly, that sounds like the most boring movie ever. If you get bored easily, avoid this movie AT ALL COSTS.

"...BUTT UP!" Waluigi shouted. Once again, I thought he's gonna say something bad. Waluigi may lose his temper easily, but he's the master of trickery.

Waluigi and I agreed (This is the third time that happened? Is the world going to end?) that the third and final race should be held at Electrodrome. It seems like one heck of a party there.

I got the boost again when the countdown ended, but here's a surprise. Waluigi messed up the countdown boost and he spun out of place! This happened to the man who claimed to have perfect timing. It turns out he's a big liar. I easily took the lead and made it through the first lap without anything happening.

At the second lap though, Waluigi managed to catch up using a Bullet Bill. Lucky stiff. I thought. Seriously though, this guy is so insanely lucky, it's almost unfair. I got the coin item and I groaned in frustration because the coin item is THE MOST USELESS ITEM IN EXISTENCE! I got hit by a Bullet Bill after that, giving Waluigi a huge lead.

At the final lap, things took a turn for the worse. I fell off the track once again, and Waluigi still had a huge lead. I got the Bullet Bill and I used it immediately. I caught up with Waluigi near the finish line and we were neck to neck, but Waluigi's car is a bit longer so his car went through the finish line a nanosecond before my car went through the finish line. I sighed in defeat, knowing that I'm going to face a month of humiliation, but I noticed something strange. At the bottom right corner, the 1st place sign is there instead of the 2nd place sign. What happened there?

Tails figured it out first. "I think it's the lag that caused Smart Sonic to win instead of Waluigi!" Tails stated. Wow. So the lag actually saved me from having my self esteem broken by Waluigi and others? That's actually pretty rare. And...awesome.

"GRRRR! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS! WHATEVER! I'M GOING TO GET YOU NEXT TIME, SMART SONIC!" Waluigi screamed. "You better believe it, Mr. Spin-off Character." I said as I ended the voice chat. I finally looked back at my friends (for what felt like minutes) and smiled. Knuckles looked proud. "I knew you'll win, Sonic!" Knuckles said. Amy looked genuinely happy. "Hooray for Smart Sonic!" Amy exclaimed. Shadow looked impressed. "Wow. Who knew you had it in you to win that race?" Shadow said.

I feel so happy and relieved that I might explode and sunshine might burst out of me. The contest is finally over and I noticed that Shadow stopped recording the video. "Hey, Shadow? Can you upload that video in my YouTube channel?" I asked. "Sure." Shadow said.

After the whole uploading process, the video documenting the whole racing competition was uploaded on my YouTube channel. That video garnered lots of views and subscriptions. My subscription number went up from 103 to 181, which is pretty impressive, even for me. After that, Knuckles, Amy, and even SHADOW congratulated me on the win and went home. Tails walked up to me and said, "Good job, Smart Sonic. I knew you had it in you." I smiled and hugged him and he hugged back. Isn't brotherly love beautiful?

After that, I felt tired and went to bed while Tails went to his room to work on one of his inventions. You know, this was one of the most fun competitions I participated. Well, except for the Waluigi part, of course. Anyways, it seems things are looking up... I thought. I slept peacefully after that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whether they like it or not, Waluigi's coming to stay because from this point on, he's a recurring antagonist. Oh, the humanity!


	4. Camping Catastrophe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Can Smart Sonic ever get some peace and quiet around here? ...No? He's going to get forced into some camping trip instead? Alright, sure, let's go with that.

Today is the most peaceful day ever. I'm reading my favorite book (my favorite books are always the slice of life books) on my couch. Tails (my younger brother) is watching Saturday morning cartoons. (I don't know why he likes to watch Saturday morning cartoons. Maybe because he's still a kid.) Yep, everything is peaceful. That is, until this LOUD commercial came up. It's so loud that the FIRST WORD made me jump up really high and fall down on the soft couch, thankfully.

"HEY THERE! ARE YOU TIRED OF LIVING YOUR LIFE LIKE AN ORDINARY PERSON?! ARE YOU TIRED OF DOING NOTHING EXCEPT BEING SMART ALL DAY?!" The commercial said. After hearing those sentences, I became very offended. I mean, come on! Who even makes fun of smart people on commercials?! That's totally uncalled for!

"WELL, CHECK OUT THE CAMPING RESORT! IT HAS ALL THE THINGS YOU CAN DO TO BECOME A MAN! FISHING, HIKING, SWIMMING! YOU CAN STAY IN THE RESORT FOR 4 DAYS FOR FREE! LIVE THROUGH ALL 4 DAYS AND YOU'LL BECOME A MAN! DON'T BELIEVE US?! WELL, LOOK AT THIS MAN WHO LIVED THROUGH 4 DAYS OF THE CAMPING RESORT!" The commercial stated.  
The commercial showed us the man with big muscles. "THIS MAN WENT TO THE CAMPING RESORT AND LIVED ALL 4 DAYS HERE!" The commercial said. The muscled man said, "I'm Matt Damon and I approve of this message!" What the heck? Does Matt even know this is a commercial?! Because he's acting like as if this is a political video. Umm, Earth to Matt: THIS IS A COMMERCIAL, NOT A POLITICAL CAMPAIGN ABOUT BEING A MAN!

Also, I can see through the commercial's lies. Here's how the commercial could be a scam. First, that man could have injected steroids into himself so he could fool people to go to this resort and end up hurting themselves trying to 'become a man'. Second, those steroids might have done something to his head because he thought this is a political video, not a commercial. Last but not least, the commercial's primary purpose is to persuade you into doing something you don't want to do. That's like a bratty child persuading some mom to buy candy for that child.

Fortunately, I'm smart enough to see through that commercial's lies. Unfortunately, Tails (being a kid that he is) is fooled by that commercial. "Smart Sonic, I want to go to that resort!" Tails said. "Tails, why do you even want to go there?" I asked. "Because I want to become a man!" Tails exclaimed. Tails looks really hopeful. I don't want to be hard on him or anything like that, but just going through a few outdoor activities is NOT going to make you a man. It's just going to give you blisters and mosquito bites. (That is, if the mosquitoes are psychotically interested in blood.)

I really hate to crush his hopes and dreams, but I have to say it. "Tails, we can't go there. It could be unsafe. Besides, that commercial's a scam and you know it." I said. Tails seems a little sad by this and for a second there, I thought he's gonna cry. But his mood changed to happy in a second. Just like that. "Okay, Sonic. I understand. Let's just forget about that and get on with our lives." Tails said. "Wow. Okay. I'm glad that you understood, Tails." I said. It's a little strange that Tails suddenly agrees with me. He didn't even put up a fight. Something's amiss...

I decide to ignore that feeling though. I mean, I'm always a paranoid guy, so it could be just me.

After that, the rest of the day went off without anything else happening. (Except for when Tails and I were having lunch and I got a phone call from Knuckles saying that he clogged the toilet at his house after he slam-dunked his basketball through the toilet. Needless to say, I threw up all the macaroni and cheeses into the trash can after hearing that disgusting story.) Before I knew it, it was already night time and I felt like going to sleep. First, I put my favorite book on my bedside desk. Then, I laid down on my bed and slept peacefully without any disturbance. Little did I know that something is going to happen tomorrow.

The next day, I woke up to the familiar morning glow and looked around. Everything seems normal...so why do I feel that something is not right? I looked at my bedside desk. And to my shock, MY FAVORITE BOOK IS NOT THERE!

It's most likely that someone stole it. I got up, put on my glasses, and walked to the living room. In the living room, I was really shocked to see some camping bags there. I walked to the kitchen next and I saw that there's barely any food in the refrigerator and cupboards, which is strange. We had lots of food there yesterday and now there's barely any of them. I walked back to the living room and saw that Tails is there now. "Tails, what's going on?" I asked. "Oh, you noticed? Well, we're getting ready for the trip to Camping Resort." Tails answered.

I think I felt my jaw drop to the floor. "WHAT?! I thought you understood, Tails!" I yelled. Tails winces a little and said, "Hey, don't worry. We're just going to do the safe outdoor activities, okay?" Yeah, right. I bet Tails is going to disobey that and do something dangerous. He's a kid, after all.

"No way." I said. "Oh, really? Well, I guess you don't need your favorite book anymore." Tails said. I gasped really dramatically. So Tails actually stole my favorite book? Now I see what's going on now. Tails stole my favorite book so he can use that book as bait to make me go to that dumb resort. You know, I think I taught Tails too well on how to be smart. Now he's using his smarts to force me to go somewhere that I don't like. "You want to read that book, don't you? Well, you have to agree that we'll go on that trip, okay?" Tails said. I don't want to go on that trip, but the book is so tempting...

"Okay, fine! But only because I want to find out if that boy in the story I was reading about escapes detention or not." I said. Tails screamed, "YAY!" Ow, my ears...

"I'm going to call my friends and see if they can come with us, okay?" I said. "OK!" Tails said. I sighed and took out my cellphone to call Amy.

"Oh? We're gonna go on a camping trip? Well, I suppose it's a nice change of pace from the usual stuff." Amy said. "Okay. I'm glad you understand." I said. At least more understanding than Tails. I thought.

Next, I called Knuckles. "I'm still unclogging the toilet!" Knuckles said. "For 16 hours?" I asked. "...Yes. Anyways, I'll join you guys on this trip." Knuckles answered.

Finally, I don't want to call Shadow because I don't want him gloating about him being better than me the whole trip. Believe me, the school year is enough. A whole trip would be torture. So therefore, I'm ready.

I picked up my camping bag and went outside and walked to the spot that we all agreed to meet at. The city bus will pick us up in a minute to take us to the resort.

"I can't believe this is happening." I muttered to myself. I sat on the bench so I can rest my legs while my friends have conversations. ("Okay, so the pi is the number that never ends." Amy said. "I love pies so much that I drool on them so I can eat them with my moist drool!" Knuckles said. Everyone, including me, stared at Knuckles like he's a freak mutant. Amy said, "That's not what I meant at all, Knuckles. Also, TMI.")

The bus came 2 minutes late. (City buses are much more slower than school buses.) We climbed onto the bus and payed the bus fee. ($2.00 for a bus ride?! What a rip-off...) We opted to stand and hang on to the poles instead of sitting next to the twins. (I swore I have seen those twins from some horror movie before...)

I sighed and looked out the window. Well then... Thanks to Tails, we ended up going to some dumb resort. I really don't want to go there. Oh well... Looks like I have to make the best out of the bad situation. I thought.

2 HOURS LATER...

After 2 hours of nothing happening (Those 2 hours gave me time to think deep thoughts. For example: "Why does Tails believe everything in commercials?"), we finally arrived at the resort. To be honest, it actually looked better in person than in the commercial. There's the waterfall, forest, and the biggest camping site I have ever seen. (Geez, I sound like a tourist now...)

"Well, here we are." Amy said. Tails squealed like a little kid (to be fair, the resort does look amazing) and looked around like almost thirty times. Talk about excited.

We entered the resort with high expectations that we're going to have a good time here.

DAY 1

We walked into the camping site and set up our stuff there. (Tails accidentally poked the hole in his own tent. Luckily, he's too excited to care. Or maybe he's excited to have his own tent sunroof.) I noticed that there's a black and red tent that's already on the site. I wonder who lives in that tent.

As if on cue, someone came out of that tent and I was really shocked. No way... I thought. Can you guess who came out of that tent? (I'm pretty sure you can, judging by the tent color and my shocked reaction.)

That's right. It's Shadow. My rival came all the way to this resort. And for what? Just to mess with me. Shadow noticed me and said, "What's up, dumb hedgehog?" I was very exasperated and I yelled out, "WHAT THE..."

FUN FACT #1: Cats hate lemons. What about Garfield, though? He can drink lemonade and eats lemon pie and enjoys it. It makes no sense! (Granted, Garfield is a cartoon animal. So no real life fun facts apply to him. Or any cartoon animals for that matter...)

"...HECK?!" I yelled. Shadow snickered. "Boy, do I love messing with you, Sonic." Shadow said. See? Even Shadow admits to doing stuff like this.

"Guys, let's go check out the forest!" Tails said. Fine by me. As long as it'll get Shadow to stop bothering me, everything is fine by me.

We walked to the forest with some hiking equipment. (i.e. water, food, a resort map, a flashlight, and an advertisement for pizza to remind us that we are hungry as heck.) We walked through the forest with no problems (Except for the raccoon attack. "GET THIS THING OFF ME BEFORE IT BITES MY BRAIN!" Knuckles screamed.), and before we knew it, it's nighttime after we got out of a forest. (Time flies when you're having fun...not. At least not on the fun part.)

"Wow, we learned so much on that hiking expedition!" Tails said. "Yeah...we sure did." I said, even though I already knew most of the stuff on that expedition. Seriously, it's like this resort has never heard of the word 'variety'.

After that, I'm so tired about this whole situation that when I fell asleep in my own tent, even the uncomfortable, rocky ground doesn't bother me. Well, at least I made it through the first day. I still need to survive the next 3 days though. I thought. I drifted off to sleep after that.

DAY 2

I woke up feeling itchy, which you can probably tell is not a great way to start a day. It turns out that there are ants in my sleeping bags. And I have a pretty good idea who is the culprit here. "SHADOW!" I yelled.

I hear Shadow's snickering as I ran out of the tent and into the lake to wash the ants off me. I don't know what the deal is with Shadow trying to mess with me. I mean, we're just competing who's smarter, not who can make each other's lives more miserable.

After that little disaster (I returned the favor by dumping water on him, even though that wasn't effective.), my friends and I decided that seeing the waterfall was a good idea. (For now.)

Once we got there, we took pictures (Because why not? We're tourists, after all.) of its sparkling water and the flowing currents. Tails got into the water because he felt like swimming despite knowing very few swimming techniques. He abruptly jumped out of the water because the water's temperature is insanely cold. "You should be careful, Tails." I admonished. Tails gave me a small glare, but he knew that I was right. He should have been more careful.

We decided that we're done having fun at the waterfall and we walked back to the camping site. It's sunset at this point, so the sky looks very beautiful. I think Mother Nature did a really great job designing this land.

We spent the rest of the evening warming up Tails since the river turned out to be VERY cold. He ended up getting a cold because of that. (Remember kids: Never touch the river if it's at the Arctic temperature.)

I went to sleep in my tent after warming Tails up. I hope he's alright... So far, things aren't going good because of injuries. (I still see the scar on Knuckles from that raccoon attack yesterday and Tails caught a cold today.) But at the same time, this trip is also kinda good and fun. (Taking the hike through the forest and seeing the waterfall are the highlights so far.)

I hope the next two days will go well. I thought. I conked out and slept because those outdoor activities really take the energy out of me.

DAY 3

Thankfully, Shadow didn't put ants in my sleeping bag this morning. (I'll thank him by not dumping water on him today.) Today, we're going to see one of the mountains in the resort. Tails is very excited about that. Maybe he likes thrilling stuff.

Once we got to the mountains, we decided to hike to the top of the mountain. Believe me, it's not easy to do that when we have to carry packs while hiking to the top, especially when we got higher. The packs seem to get pushed down by gravity a lot and it feels like you're going to get squished because of it. (Knuckles said, "Gravity will not be stronger than me!" He tried lifting his pack- to no avail.)

When we got to the top, we discovered that we're actually standing on top of a volcano. Why no one noticed that until now, no one knows. "Wow! This is way too hot for me to handle!" I said, while fanning my face with my hands. "Nothing's too hot for me to handle!" Tails exclaimed. He flew above the center of the volcano. Let me tell you, seeing Tails being reckless like that makes my blood boil. Literally, in this case. "Tails! Get..."

FUN FACT #2: An alligator has 80 teeth. Geez, the dentists are going to take a long time to clean that alligator's teeth. Not to mention the possibility of death by being eaten by an alligator.

"...back here!" I yelled. Tails sighs. "Fine." He said begrudgingly. That's not the kind of attitude I was looking for, but whatever. "Let's get back to the site." Amy said. We walked back to the site.

The rest of the day was uneventful. (Just like pickle festivals. Sorry, pickle fans!) The only thing that happened was that my friends and I are roasting marshmallows. (And making bad puns about roasting someone. For example: "Hey, guys, remember that I roasted Waluigi for being a spin-off character?" I said. Everyone stayed silent except for Knuckles, who said, "Dude, that joke is old so you better shut up before I turn you into a spin-off character!")

After that, it's bed time. Again. I'm excited because the trip is going to be over tomorrow. Phew! It's about time! I thought. I fell to sleep early because I want to make the nights go faster with my sleeping.

DAY 4

Thank goodness today's the last day! This is the first thought I had this morning. (Besides the "Are monkeys really primates?" deep thought.)

All we did that day was picking flowers. (And getting yelled at by the park rangers for picking said flowers.) I obviously got the cool blue flower, Tails got the bright yellow tulip, Knuckles dug out the vivid red rose, Amy took out the pretty pink flower, and Shadow...burned the sunflowers. (Hey, he's a bit of a destructive guy.)

After that, it's FINALLY time to go. "Aww... I wasn't a man!" Tails said. "Don't worry, Tails. You'll be a man someday. For now, just enjoy being a kid. It's actually more fun than being a man." I said. "Hmm...maybe you're right. From now on, I'll live every moment to the fullest!" Tails exclaimed. "That's the spirit, bro!" I said.

At this point, the bus came and we climbed onto the bus. We sat on the seats this time. (Because no one creepy is sitting next to us this time.)

2 hours later, as soon as I got home, I ran inside and went to the kitchen because I'm so hungry for real food. But I noticed that my favorite book is on the kitchen table. THE WHOLE TIME. I can't believe this...

Anyways, I took the book and read the rest of it at my room. (Spoiler alert: The boy in the story did escape detention.) After that, it's nighttime and Tails walked into my room. "Hey, Sonic. I just want to say that I'm sorry for dragging you into this trip. I know that you didn't enjoy it." Tails said dejectedly. "Hey, Tails. Don't worry. I actually kinda had fun on this trip. Thanks for the trip. And I forgive you." I said. Tails smiled. "Thanks, Sonic." Tails said. "You're welcome, bro." I answered. I yawned and laid down on my bed. "Good night, Tails." I said. "Good night, Sonic." Tails answered. After that, I slept really peacefully.


	5. Virtual Reality Hijinks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smart Tails just made the latest invention and he wants to show it to Smart Sonic. Too bad the latter doesn't seem too impressed, considering the former's track record with past inventions, but maybe this time, this new invention can surprise him and blow his socks off.

"Tails, are you sure this invention is going to work this time?" I asked.

"Yes, I'm very sure of it!" Tails exclaimed in excitement.

I stared at the hoverboard in wonder and disbelief. What if this invention fails just like the last two? I thought.

In case you're wondering what's going on right now, Tails made 4 inventions last night, which doesn't seem humanely possible, and he wanted me to test them out. I only agreed to do this because he's my brother. I wish I didn't do that because these last two inventions are complete failures. The first invention, which is a toaster, (Which was already invented by Charles Strite. Either Tails didn't know that or he's trying to commit plagiarism.) shoots toasts at me until Tails turns it off. The second invention is a singing robot, but the robot seems more interested in shooting lasers at us than singing.

I sighed and said, "Fine. I'll trust you. I'm just hoping this invention works. Otherwise, I'll give this invention an F." "Umm, Sonic, we're not at school. Besides, you're not a teacher. You're just my smart brother who cares too much about perfection!" Tails yelled. I gasped. I can't believe that Tails has a gall to talk to me like that. I thought he's just my annoying little brother. Now I know that he's even MORE annoying than usual. "EXCUSE ME, but I just hate how you care more about inventions than your older brother!" I yelled back. Tails gasped. He's probably thinking what I'm thinking right now. "YOU BACK THAT TAKE! ER, I MEAN, YOU TAKE THAT BACK! GRR, I'M SO ANGRY THAT I CAN'T EVEN SAY SENTENCES RIGHT!" Tails screamed. "Whoa, you sound like Knuckles." I remarked. "Just get on the stupid hoverboard!" Tails snapped.

I flinched a little. Tails has never said anything bad about his inventions. Then again, he's too blinded by anger to think straight. Hey! Maybe he's trying to do the Knuckles impression because that's exactly who Knuckles is. Maybe, maybe not. Anyways, I got on the hoverboard and Tails pressed the button to turn it on. It started to float up and it seems like this invention might actually work. Tails presses the button that transfers the controls to the hoverboard so I can control it with my feet. I made the hoverboard go forward and it did exactly that. I flinched (Geez, it's not even a minute and I flinched again. There's no way I'm THAT easily impressed.) because Tails' hoverboard might actually work. I looked back at Tails and exclaimed, "Hey, Tails! Your hoverboard invention actually works for once!" "Yeah, that's great and all, and for the record, that's not the first time one of my inventions works. But I think you shouldn't look back or else the hover board might malfunction and crash into SOMETHING!" Tails yelled.

Too late. The hoverboard suddenly swerved all over the place. "UH OH!" I yelled. The hoverboard keeps spinning in circles and I felt like I'm going to throw up an actual disgusting hurricane. I'm pretty sure that Tails face-palmed while this carnage was happening. After that, it crashes into a telephone pole. I jumped off the hover board before it happens, but not before I threw up on the hoverboard. I felt dizzy after getting up. This hoverboard has a few kinks, but other than that, it's a pretty fun invention. Tails needs a little more experience so he can be a better inventor.

Once I shook off the dizziness, I looked at Tails. He looks like he's ready to snap. "SONIC! BE A LITTLE MORE CAREFUL NEXT TIME!" Tails exclaimed. "Well, you should learn to be more smarter then!" I yelled. Tails sighed. "Follow me. I'm going to show you my last invention. I worked really hard on this invention." Tails said. He walked inside the house and into the living room. I followed and I saw a giant, white machine there. Not only that, this machine looks really familiar. What could it be...?

"Sonic, you might remember this invention from several months ago. This is the Jumbotron 5000, but I made several tweaks and I worked really hard on improving it. This machine not only transports you to TV, it also can transport you into pretty much any technology. Let's try transporting into the PS4." Tails explained. AHA! I knew there's something familiar about this machine. And Tails wasn't kidding when he said that he improved this machine. It looks very sleek. It might be an even better invention than the hoverboard. "Okay. Let's try it out." I said.

Tails pressed the white button and the white ray suddenly bursts from the TV and we got transported to the TV. This seems awfully familiar...

Everything's dark. "Umm, Tails? What's going on?" I asked. "The TV hasn't been turned on. Let me fix this." Tails answered. He pressed the red button on his controller. The TV turned on to reveal a technical difficulties screen. "Tails, I think we broke the fourth wall." I said. "AGAIN?! I thought I fixed that." Tails exclaimed. He presses the rainbow button and the TV turns on to reveal... oh no... Teen Titans Go! OH NO!

"HEY, IT'S THESE TWO GUYS! GET THEM!" Robin screamed. "Tails, hurry up and change the channel!" I said. "Okay, okay!" Tails yelled. He presses the blue button and the static came on for a few seconds before revealing some teen drama sitcom. Oh well, at least it's better than Teen Titans Go.

I noticed that we're standing on a sidewalk next to the diner. We looked at the big window and we saw the teenage couple arguing. Which is not surprising to me. This always happens in teen drama sitcoms. One couple argues about practically everything. This can range from arguing about someone cheating on someone else, to arguing about who has a better donkey. It practically makes no sense for someone who is a big fan of reality. (Which would be me.)

Anyways, we looked at the argument in disbelief. "JOHN, I'M BREAKING UP WITH YOU FOR ABSOLUTELY NO REASON!" The girl said. "ALICE, PLEASE DON'T BREAK UP WITH ME! WITHOUT YOU, I'LL BE A NORMAL TEENAGER AGAIN!" John screamed. I rolled my eyes at that. "Tails, I think this is THE most ridiculous thing I have ever seen. Do you agree, bro?" I said in a deadpan way. Tails is cringing and he says, "Yes, I definitely agree with you, Sonic. I mean, do you even hear what they're saying? It makes no sense whatsoever!" Tails exclaimed. We looked back at the window.

"I REALLY HATE YOU FOR NO REASON OTHER THAN INCREASING DRAMA!" Alice screamed. "SERIOUSLY?! DRAMA?! ARE YOU CHEATING ON ME FOR A GUY NAMED DRAMA?! I THOUGHT YOU LIKED MY MUSCLES!" John yelled. Of course. Guys always remind girls that they have muscles. As if that makes things any better. "I LIKE GUYS WHO ARE SMART, NOT GUYS WHO HAVE LUMPS OF FLESH ON THEIR ARMS!" Alice screamed and ran out of the diner and she seems to be running for me. I look horrified. "Tails, please change the channel before she sees me!" I exclaimed. "Bad news, Sonic! The remote is on cool-down for 1 minute!" Tails said. Oh no. Well, this is the end for me. I braced myself for the impending cringe as Alice ran closer to me with her arms out...

...except that she ran past me and hugged the telephone pole. "I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, DRAMA! YOU MAKE ME FEEL BETTER BY DESTROYING OTHER PEOPLE'S RELATIONSHIPS FOR ME!" Alice yelled. "ARE YOU SERIOUS?! THIS IS DRAMA?! WELL, I HOPE A LOT OF DRAMA HAPPENS BETWEEN YOU TWO!" John yelled. He sat down and ate lots of ice cream that were served to him, which is a basic method for coping with break-ups.

"Hey, Sonic! The remote is working again!" Tails said. "Thank goodness." I said. Tails pushed the light green button. The screen changed to the blue screen that said, "WARNING: EPILEPSY!" Afterwards, the warning disappeared to reveal the PS4 menu! Yes! We're finally here, after all the mishaps and cringe, we finally made it!

"Whoa... Look at this, Tails!" I said. I punched a profile picture button and it shows off every achievement I have earned playing video games. Yes, you can earn something for playing video games. That is, if you're skilled at it.

"Geez, bro, how much achievements have you earned?!" Tails said. "I have earned a thousand achievements. You might as well call me the true gamer." I said. "Yeah, right. It seems more like you're wasting your life getting them." Tails said in a deadpan way. "Whatever, Tails." I angrily said.

A minute after looking at the achievements (Tails looked at the achievement for dying the most and laughed. "HA! Seems like the game felt sorry for you there." Tails joked. I rolled my eyes at him.), we heard a loud knock at our house door. The knocks got way more louder and I heard a crash sound. Who broke the door down? "Oh, come on! I just fixed that door!" Tails said.

We can see through the television screen, so we saw who the culprit is. It's Knuckles and he walked into the living room. "Man, I'm so impatient!" Knuckles said. He noticed that the TV is on and he touched the controller. As soon as he did that though, the pop-up text appeared that said, "ERROR: SMART VIRUS!" "What the? I don't get it." Knuckles said. Then he noticed that he has to press the X button to send the Anti-Virus after the Smart Virus. Knuckles realized this and he pressed the X button. "HAHAHAHA! TAKE THAT, SMART VIRUS!" Knuckles said.

We're unaware of what's happening outside the screen because we can see Knuckles, but we can't hear him. Suddenly, the Anti-Virus came out of nowhere and tried to delete us. They shot death rays in order to do so. Luckily, Tails and I are pretty nimble (thanks to gym class), so we moved to the left pretty fast and ran to one of the games. We pressed the yellow button to get inside the game while the Anti-Viruses followed.

Tails and I are suddenly in the basketball game. We looked around. The Warriors are going against Cavaliers on the Cavaliers arena. The game seems interesting to watch, but there's no time to waste. The Anti-Viruses are trying to delete us so we ran to the court and the Anti-Viruses came into the arena soon after. They searched around the sidelines. Thankfully, they haven's seen us...

Unfortunately, some dumb referee feels the need to blow his whistle. TWEET! The basketball players looked at the referee like the referee is crazy. "FOUL! The animals are on the court again! Who keeps letting the animals out?!" The referee yelled. He looked at one timid basketball player. "J.R. Smith, you better not release the animals again!" The referee screamed. "Whoa, whoa. Hold up. That wasn't me this time. That animal came here on its own!" J.R. yelled. "Dude, I'm not an it. I'm a he." I said coldly. Shortly after that, the referee looked shocked. Then he ran away screaming. Because he doesn't expect me to talk. Humans are so squeamish these days...

I just wish that he didn't scream so loudly. Why? Because that drew the Anti-Viruses' attention and they went after us. We ran out of the arena and back into the PS4 menu. We looked around for the next game to enter. We saw one and Tails pressed the yellow button to get us into the game.

We're standing near a backyard. Over the fence, we saw some goat that's walking around. The goat seems fairly normal...until he decided to ram the fence over. "BAAAAA!" The goat bleated. "Thankfully, I have a translator button on my remote, just in case we encounter some foreign beings." Tails said. "Dude, it's just a goat." I said. "Umm, did you even see that he rammed the fence down?! That's no normal goat!" Tails protested. I thought it over for a few seconds. "Okay, you have a point there." I admitted. Tails pressed the purple button and the microphone sprouted out on the top of the remote. "BAAAA!" The goat bleated. The BAAAAAs soon turned into words. "I'M FINALLY FREE!" The goat screamed. I jumped back in shock. Geez, that goat is unusually LOUD. It can even give screaming goats a run for its money!

Once again, that scream attracted attention from the Anti-Viruses. "Delete these viruses!" The Anti-Viruses said in monotone fashion. "Wait... How can you speak all of a sudden?" I inquired. The Anti-Viruses said, without any expression. "Huh? Well, it all started like this..."

(FLASHBACK: A few minutes ago...)

The Anti-Viruses walked around the PS4 menu in search of us, ready to explode at the slightest sight of us. The advertisement suddenly got in the Anti-Viruses' way. "HEY THERE! DO YOU WANT TO HAVE A VOICE SO YOU CAN TELL THE VIRUSES TO STOP?!" The advertisement said. The Anti-Viruses looked at each other, obviously discussing whether or not they should get the voices so they can uselessly yell at us.

They nodded in agreement and they decided to get voices. "ALRIGHT! THE VOICES COST $12 EACH!" The advertisement said. The Anti-Viruses did a double take at that info. They want to kill viruses, not buy stuff. (Yes, the Anti-Viruses are secretly cheapskates. Hey, you learn something new every day.) The Anti-Viruses glared at the advertisement. Seconds later, the advertisement got deleted, leaving the voices behind. The Anti-Viruses grabbed the voices and installed them on their files. (Even the Anti-Viruses have files. It's mostly backup files.) Then they decided to get inside the goat video game because one of the Anti-Viruses sensed that we're in that game. (And because it likes goats.)

(END OF FLASHBACK)

"Wow... That's quite a story, dude, but frankly, I don't really care." I said. I ran away with Tails and the goat following. The Anti-Viruses pursued in hopes of deleting us. (Which is messed up on the Anti-Viruses' behalf.) The goat (Whom Tails named Betty, much to my chagrin.), Tails, and I got on the back of the covered truck. Unfortunately, for the Anti-Viruses, they can only see in one direction, so they didn't see us get on the truck.

"Dang, we lost them." The Anti-Virus said. "Hey, look at that tall building in the city! They're probably interested in going there! So let's go there!" The other Anti-Virus said. "Of course. Because tall buildings always helps you follow viruses." The third Anti-Virus said sarcastically. (Even though it's hard to tell because their voices are monotone.) "Umm... Do you actually mean that or are you being sarcastic?" The second Anti-Virus asked. The third Anti-Virus sighed (Wait, they can sigh? That would never happen.) and said, "Let's just go to the city. They might be there." Afterwards, they floated to the city.

Meanwhile, we're sitting in the back of the covered truck. Unfortunately, it's full of pigs, so it smells pretty bad, but it's worth it to escape from the Anti-Viruses. "Geez, these Anti-Viruses really wants us to be gone." I groaned. "Thankfully, the truck is fast, so we can make a quick getaway." Tails explained. "THIS TRUCK IS SO BORING! LET'S MAKE THINGS INTERESTING!" Betty shouted. "Oh no you don't!" Tails and I protested, but it's too late. Betty rammed the side of the truck, and let me tell you, that goat can pack a punch. Therefore, the truck flipped to its side and it crashed to a city building. Betty, Tails, and I jumped out of the truck in time before the truck exploded. Geez, video games are so unrealistic nowadays. Trucks cannot explode that easily. It'll just break into pieces.

Anyways, Betty, Tails, and I ran to the tallest building in the city and entered the building. The elevators aren't far away from the entrance, so we went inside the elevator. While waiting for the elevator to go up to the tallest floor of the building, Tails sneezed and I coughed. That's the typical awkward elevator moment. What makes the elevator moment even MORE awkward is that Betty farted while we're halfway on this elevator ride. Therefore, Tails and I end up suffering the gas elevator. (Not the lethal kind, mind you, it's the disgusting kind.)

Once we FINALLY reached the tallest point of the building (and we can finally breath), we admonished Betty for farting in the elevator. "Betty, that's not cool! That's disgusting!" Tails yelled. "Not to mention immature." I added. "I'M A GOAT! I DON'T CARE! NOW WHERE'S THE ORANGE JUICE?!" Betty screamed. Betty should invent the new language: Screaming Goat-nese.

Once we're finished admonishing Betty (It has no effect on this apathetic goat.), we looked around. There appears to be some sort of rooftop party. There's the DJ that plays music that'll get you in trouble if you put any of this music in your YouTube videos. (In other words, copyrighted music.) There's some people dancing like crazy. And there's... Anti-Viruses?! "Ha, I knew we should have went to the tallest building. The viruses are attracted to it like moths to a light." The Anti-Virus said. Gulp. Looks like it's time to escape again. Except that one of the Anti-Viruses deleted the elevator when we got out, so there's no chance of escape. Luckily, I saw some ray gun on one of the tables (Who knows where they got that from...), and I shot it at one of the Anti-Viruses. Believe it or not, it worked! The Anti-Virus looked shocked as it was starting to disappear from existence. "Oh no! Please tell my grandma that I wish she gave me more cookies!" The Anti-Virus yelled as it disappeared. (Geez, what is up with bad guys and their relatives?)

Fortunately, we have an idea. Shoot all the Anti-Viruses mindlessly. (Not my style, but I can live with that.) So, Tails presses the cyan button on his remote and it shoots lasers at the second Anti-Virus. ("NOOO! I never got to drink orange juice!" The second Anti-Virus said before dissolving into dust. The third Anti-Virus looked at the second Anti-Virus in disbelief before getting rammed by Betty.) After that, we looked around at the aftermath. The people are still dancing as if this fight didn't happen. (Now I know where Betty got this apathetic personality from.) This seems too easy...

Two laser beams zapped me and Tails. Oh no! It seems that there's a fourth Anti-Virus who likes to be sneaky. And he deleted us. That's what I call a surprise delete. Will it be the end of Smart Sonic and Smart Tails?

Actually, no. A few seconds after we got deleted (Betty didn't get deleted because she's part of the game. Without her-or the other goats for that matter-the game would be boring.), we're suddenly in a black void of nothingness. We're just floating around in a void. Thankfully, they didn't delete Tails' remote. Unfortunately, it doesn't work in a void. "OH COME ON!" Tails yelled. I covered my ears because everything echoes in the void, including the loud noises. I sighed. "Tails, this is all your fault. If only you make this remote work in the void, we wouldn't be stuck in a void!" I shouted. Tails covered his ears because of the aforementioned echo problem. Then he looked like he's going to explode. But he feels sad, and he started to float away from me. Now I felt sorry that I yelled at him and accused him for getting us into this mess. Maybe it's about time that I apologize. "Tails, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I'm just tired of these inventions backfiring on us." I said. Tails didn't turn back to me. It must have been worse than I thought.

"Look, I know you're heartbroken over your inventions not working, but the truth is that your hoverboard invention is actually great. As long as you fix the kinks, it'll be even better. And this Jumbotron 5000 invention is very fun. We had fun adventures until we got stuck on the void. All I'm saying is that practice makes perfect." I said. Tails still didn't turn around.

Now I'm just wondering what he's doing. As soon as I started floating over to him though, he turned around with a smile on his face. "Hey, Sonic! I figured out the way to get out of the void!" Tails said excitedly. "You do?" I asked. "Yep! You see, I modified my remote to make this big hole appear in 3...2...1..."

All of a sudden, a big hole appeared out of nowhere. It sucked us out of a void. Once we're out of the void, we found out that it's right next to the PS4 menu. And we also found out that there's a broken hole on the TV screen. That means we can just jump out of it. So far, so good...

Tails and I did that and we're at our living room now. "Phew! That was quite an adventure we had! Don't you agree?" I asked. "Yeah. By the way, thanks for the inspiring speech, Sonic." Tails said. "No problem, bro." I said. Then we noticed that the TV screen is broken. Who could have broken it? Wait a minute...

"KNUCKLES!" I yelled. Knuckles ran to the living room with a sandwich in his hand. He looked at the broken TV screen and back at my angry face. "Umm... I can explain." Knuckles said meekly. "You better explain!" I shouted. "Okay, okay. Here's how it happened." Knuckles said.

(FLASHBACK: 1 hour ago...)

Knuckles was playing Goat Simulator and he's having a fun time until an alert popped up. "You owe $12 for buying the voices for your Anti-Viruses." The alert notification said. "WHAT?! OH HECK NO! I'M NOT PAYING FOR THAT! YOU DESERVE A BEATING, TV!" Knuckles yelled.

He punched the TV screen HARD. It was after a few minutes that Knuckles realized what he has done. "...Oops." Knuckles said.

(END OF FLASHBACK)

"So that's what really happened?" I asked. "Yup." Knuckles replied. I calmed down and realized that friends and family are more important than TV screens. "Okay, I'm over it now. Who wants some ice cream? I'm paying." I said. Knuckles looked at me as if I'm crazy, but he didn't complain.

"Umm, no need to do that, Sonic. I made a bonus invention that makes ice cream. Follow me." Tails walked into the kitchen. Knuckles and I followed.

In the kitchen, we saw the invention. It has a nice ice cream design. "All I have to do is pour water on the top and the ice cream will come out on the bottom." Tails explained. He did exactly that while Knuckles and I are anticipating the results.

It turns out that the ice cream exploded out of the bottom. We got covered in ice cream. Another kink in his inventions. I licked my face. "Cookies and cream. Yummy. I think you forgot the cone part, but you can practice and sooner or later, you'll make the perfect ice cream machine." I said. Tails looks dejected at first, but he cheered up after that speech. It's nice to know that he has some more experience now. So we spent the rest of the day with ice cream on us. It's the most delicious and fun day I ever had.


	6. Substitute Teacher Craze

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Believe it or not, it has always been Smart Sonic's childhood dream to be a teacher someday. Imagine the unbridled joy he obtained when he gets an opportunity to do so. Of course, not everything is what it seems...

Tails and I are playing Mario Kart 8 right now. Before you ask any questions, let me explain. Ever since we beat Waluigi in Mario Kart 8 (And by we, I mean me. Tails just sat, along with others, to watch me beat Waluigi in that contest.), not only did he get made fun of mercilessly, he also had to send a McDonald's meal to us. Not to mention that he had to pay for the meal, too. That's honestly kind of harsh, but a deal's a deal.

The meal was in my mailbox today. (Somehow... Who knows how the meal got here from another world...) Unfortunately, it's stale (Waluigi must have made it stale on purpose for a little revenge. Waluigi must have been taking the saying, "Revenge is a dish best served cold" too literally.), but we enjoyed the meal anyway. After that, Tails and I played a few races of Mario Kart 8 in honor of the contest. I have been getting the hang of 200cc recently, so I didn't fall off the track or crash into the walls as often as I used to. "YES! I won again!" I shouted after winning the race at Cheese Land. "Of course you won! Because I didn't have much practice in 200cc AND Cheese Land is one of the hardest courses in EXISTENCE!" Tails screamed.

"Geez, you're starting to sound like Waluigi for a minute there." I said. Tails just walked out of my room in a huff. That's so typical for young gamers. They rage quit too easily. I shrugged and decided to play Single Player Online mode. After a few minutes of racing with people around the world (I have got to ask the Japanese players how they're so good at Mario Kart 8.), I heard the doorbell. I walked over to the door, wondering who would be at my door at 11:00 PM. (Seriously, who would be knocking on doors this late in the night?) I opened the door and it revealed some mailman with an envelope. "Special delivery to Sonic the Smart Hedgehog!" The mailman said. "That's weird. I didn't order any deliveries." I said. "Hey, Edna didn't order a box of kittens I delivered to her 2 months ago and yet, she became a crazy cat lady a month later!" The mailman exclaimed. "Umm... who's Edna?" I questioned. The mailman face palmed and said, "Your next door neighbor, you dingle!" "Hey, dude, nobody calls people 'dingle' anymore." I said.

The mailman got enraged and threw the envelope at the floor. Then he ran away like a maniac while shouting, "YOU BETTER GIVE ME A BIG RAISE, BOSS! OR ELSE I'LL BREAK YOUR DOOR DOWN!" "Geez, that's one crazy mailman." I commented. After this crazy conversation, I picked up the envelope and opened it. There's an alphabet letter inside it. Wait, what? I think this mailman misunderstood the meaning of the word "letter". Then I noticed that there's another letter- an actual mail letter. I threw out the letter "S" and read the actual mail letter. The mail letter said:

(START OF MAIL LETTER)

Dear Sonic the Smart Hedgehog,

We have an opportunity of you becoming the substitute teacher at our new school called Screaming School. (No, it doesn't have to do with actual screaming. That's just how the school is named. Geez.) In this school, you'll have the best teaching experience ever. Even the kids are well behaved. (No, really.) Oh, and you can also have cake in the cafeteria. (Because everyone loves cake.) The kids can have cake for lunch, too, but don't worry. They definitely won't be hyperactive after eating cake.

Come to my office tomorrow so you can be hired. Trust me, this is the best substitute job you'll ever have.

Sincerely, A Mysterious Principal

P.S. If you don't come to my office tomorrow, we'll come and destroy your house.

P.P.S. FOR THE LAST TIME, I AM NOT PRINCESS PEACH! THAT'S JUST HOW I WRITE LETTERS! GEEZ!

(END OF MAIL LETTER)

After reading the letter out loud 3 times (I read it 3 times to make sure this wasn't a dream), I feel happy. "Wow... This is my dream come true!" I exclaimed. Tails ran down the stairs and ran to the same room I was in right now. "Sonic, something smells fishy." Tails said in a concerned tone. "Well, something won't smell fishy if you haven't left the salmon on the table, Tails!" I shouted. Tails face palmed and said, "I didn't mean that literally, dude. I'm talking about the letter! They're going to destroy the house if you don't go! Doesn't that sound suspicious to you?" Tails asked incredulously. After Tails said that, I realized something. Something does seem shady...but I'm too blinded by my childhood dream to care.

"I'm going to teach the class tomorrow! Okay, Tails?" I said. Tails looked exasperated until he decided that maybe it's for the best. "Okay." Tails said. "Don't worry. I'll also do this to protect our house." I said. That seemed to cheer Tails up. Afterwards, I went to rest on my bed so I can gather up energy for tomorrow.

(THE NEXT DAY...)

I woke up in my bed feeling really excited. Today is the day that I'll become a substitute teacher at Screaming School. (Which is a very weird name, by the way.) After getting up and putting on my glasses, I ran down the stairs in excitement. Before I ran out the front door though, Tails stopped me. "Sonic? Before you go, I'm going to give you a small communicator so you can update me on what's going on today. Here you go." Tails explained. He gave me a small yellow communicator. "Thanks, bro." I said. "No problem, dude." Tails replied. After that, I ran out the front door.

It's a 5 minute walk to the Screaming School because it's a bit close to the neighborhood I live in. After I made it to the school, I looked at the school sign. The sign is purple with the twisty mustache in front of it. That's what I call the most unusual school sign in the world, but I'll let that slide.

When I walked inside the school though, it's even more unusual. The halls are entirely purple. Obviously, the principal's favorite color is purple.

I walked inside to the principal's office and saw... No. No! NO! NOOOO! "WALUIGI?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?! AND WHY ARE YOU THE PRINCIPAL OF THIS SCHOOL?!" I screamed. "WAHAHAHAHA! AND YOU SAID I SCREAM TOO MUCH!" Waluigi screamed. "Dude, you're still screaming. That makes you a hypocrite." I said matter-of-factually. "GRRRR! BE QUIET OR ELSE YOU'RE FIRED AND I'LL DESTROY YOUR HOUSE!" Waluigi shouted. This is a revolting turn of events...

I decided to ask him a question. "So how did you get here? It's my home world, not yours, so how did you even get here? And how did you become a principal?" I asked incredulously.

"WELL, IT ALL STARTED WHEN I WANTED TO SEND A LETTER TO MY GRANDMA! UNFORTUNATELY, SHE'S IN THE OTHER WORLD, WHICH IS TOO FAR AWAY! SO, ALL I DID IS MARK THE ENVELOPE FRAGILE AND IT'LL BE SENT TO THE ANOTHER WORLD! NEEDLESS TO SAY, GRANDMA IS NOT AMUSED! SO, I PUT MYSELF INSIDE THE HUMAN SIZED PACKAGE AND MARKED MYSELF FRAGILE! THANKS TO THAT, I GOT SENT TO YOUR WORLD! AFTER THAT, I FOUND AN ABANDONED SCHOOL AND I FOUND A PRINCIPAL LICENSE INSIDE OF THAT SCHOOL! THEN, I REBUILT THIS SCHOOL! HOW? BY BRIBING THE CONSTRUCTION WORKERS! WITH FREE CANDY! SEVERAL DAYS LATER, THE SCHOOL HAS BEEN BUILT! ISN'T THAT GLORIOUS?!" Waluigi screamed the whole explanation.

I cringed during the explanation because Waluigi is so loud. Even louder than an airplane! After the explanation, I said, "No, it's not glorious at all. It's just stupid and meaningless. I mean, why are you even doing this?" I questioned. "SO I CAN FILL UP MY JOB DESCRIPTION! AND BECAUSE I WANT TO ANNOY YOU!" Waluigi yelled. "Way to be brutally honest, dude." I said.

"OK, ENOUGH CHIT-CHAT! I'M GOING TO ASSIGN YOU TO A GROUP OF KINDERGARTNERS! THEY'RE IN CLASSROOM 1-A, AWAITING THEIR NEW TEACHER! NOW GO THERE BEFORE I FIRE YOU!" Waluigi bellowed. I ran out of his office quickly after that. I went inside Classroom 1-A and I saw...lots of chaos. Most of the kids are breaking the toys in this classroom. Some of the kids are even breaking the tables. Geez... I can't believe I got assigned to a bunch of wild animals...which is ironic because I'm a hedgehog.

I decided to get things in order. "Kids, kids!" I shouted. The kids looked at me in creepy unison. "Umm... Since you kids broke all the tables in this room, you'll sit down on the floor." I ordered. Every kid did- except one. That kid looked like a rebel, which is an obvious indication that he likes to cause trouble. I looked down at the list of names.

(LIST OF STUDENT NAMES)

Brandon: He's a kid who loves to eat food. Too much, in fact. Geez, somebody call an ambulance.

Carrie: She's a kid who LOVES to think about negative stuff. ESPECIALLY if it's about the end of the world. If only she went to talk to the counselor...

Danny: He's a kid who loves being smart. Give him any complicated question and he'll definitely answer it correctly. Why isn't he at college already?

Juliet: She's a very dramatic kid, that's for sure. And it's all because of that play called 'Romeo and Juliet'! Stupid William Shakespeare...

Felix: He's a complete opposite of Carrie. In other words, he's way too happy for his own good. He's even happy when he's eating peas! No normal kid does that!

Wanda: She's a girl who would become queen...not. Seriously, she acts way too snooty and because of this, she's very sophisticated and mean. Maybe being born in a British family has something to do with this...

Lamar: He's a kid who thinks he's too cool for school. He definitely loves to rap too, much to the chagrin of the other students.

Nancy: She's a kid who loves video games. That's unfortunate because the school doesn't allow that. That doesn't stop her from bringing games to school though...

Randy: He's the biggest troublemaker EVER. He's a bully too. You better steer clear of this person or else...

Mary: She's practically the most perfect human being ever. Because of this, everybody hates her. Not to mention that she LOVES to steal people's attention. YOU BETTER PUNISH HER IF SHE KEEPS STEALING PEOPLE'S ATTENTION OR IF SHE KEEPS BRAGGING ABOUT BEING PERFECT!

(END OF LIST)

I chuckled after reading this list. Apparently, the last teacher who taught these kids love to leave tips on the student name list. Not to mention that he/she has my sense of humor too. Thankfully, the tips are very useful, so I looked at Randy and said, "You better sit down with these kids, young man, Or else!"

Randy glared at me and it looks like he's gonna lose his temper...except that he calmed down and sat with the other kids. Wow. So all I have to do is say, "Or else!" at the end of every command and Randy will obey. That seems too easy, but I'm not complaining.

I looked at the class schedule. I grinned when the first thing we have to do is read. "It's time to read some fun books, class!" I exclaimed. "Books are boring. Video games are much better." Nancy said. I looked at Nancy like she's crazy. Then I noticed that Nancy is playing on the handheld video game system. "Nancy, if you don't want your game system to be confiscated, then you better pay attention to story time." I said. Nancy growled and she put the system away.

I took out one of the books from the bookshelf. The book is 'Jack and the Beanstalk'. I always thought the book is unrealistic so I revised the book to be more realistic. (I revised the book in my mind, mind you.)

Once I began to sit down, I started to read my revised story to the children. Here's how the story went:

(START OF STORY)

Once upon a time, there was a teenage boy named Jack who lives with his mom, which is really lame. The mom is very enraged at Jack for not doing anything at all apparently. "Jack, we're so poor that we give hobos the run for their money! Which we have very little of! This stupid economy raised the dollar prices again and we can barely afford anything!" Jack's mom said.

"That's what you get for making us move to a low income neighborhood, mom!" Jack yelled. "Well, you better sell this cow that we inexplicably got or else we won't get paid!" Jack's mom howled. "All right, fine, mom! UGH! By the way, you're no wolf." Jack retorted. "JUST GO!" Jack's mom screamed. Jack quickly ran out of the house while dragging a cow with rope.

Jack made it to the cow dealership a few minutes later. "A cow dealership? Geez, they'll make a dealership for anything these days..." Jack thought. He saw a really hyper salesman. The salesman saw Jack and said, "OH, HI THERE! WELCOME TO THE COW DEALERSHIP! WE DON'T HAVE ANY CHEAP COWS, SO WOULD YOU LIKE A GREEN BEAN INSTEAD?!" Jack looked at the salesman in shock. "...Fine. I'll sell you a cow for the green bean." Jack offered. "DEAL! HAVE A NICE DAY!" The salesman yelled. Then he took the cow and gave the beans to Jack. "Sheesh, this guy's a little too excited." Jack said as he walked back to his house.

Jack made it back to the house at evening. His mom isn't amused by the situation. "GREEN BEAN?! YOU TRADED THE COW JUST FOR THE GREEN BEAN?!" Jack's mom bellowed. "Hey, maybe green beans could be used as currency." Jack said. "NO, IT DOES NOT, YOU IDIOT!" Jack's mom screamed. Jack growled and said, "YOU KNOW WHAT?! I HATE YOU SO MUCH, MO-!"

(END OF STORY)

"Umm, this story is way too realistic for me." Carrie interrupted. "This story makes me hungry for green beans." Brandon said. "This story is nothing but balderdash!" Wanda shouted. "Come on, guys. We haven't even got to the part where the beanstalk grew thanks to photosynthesis. Or the part where Jack complains about taxes to the giant." I protested. "That sounds really interesting!" Danny said. Of course Danny would say that, he's the smart one. "I beg to differ! I am better than the story!" Mary bragged. I got really triggered by this. Then I remembered that I should punish her because she's bragging about being perfect. "Mary, go to time-out. Never brag about being perfect again." I ordered. "WHY?!" Mary screamed. "Because no one is perfect." I said. Mary grumbled when she sat down near the corner, facing it.

The kids looked shocked. Then they decided to stay silent because they don't want any risk of being punished. A few minutes later, the bell rang and it's time to go to the gym. I took Mary away from the corner and led the kids to the gym. After we got to the gym, I got the second surprise of the day. Shadow is there, and he also has a herd of small kids following him. I sighed, knowing how this will turn out.

"What's up, academic rival?" Shadow said in a condescending tone. I groaned. "Shadow, I'm going to show you how the real teacher gets his job done. Because the real teacher isn't very condescending like you." I retorted. Shadow narrowed his eyes at me. "Oh really?" Shadow said. "Yes, really. Now what sports game do you want to play?" I asked. Shadow smirked and took a ball from the basketball rack. Then he threw it at me. It barely misses me, but it bounced back from the wall and hits me on the back. "OW! So I'm guessing you want to play dodge-ball." I guessed. I think I heard a bone crack in my body. I don't feel much pain though...

After that, Shadow and I put all the dodge-balls in the middle of the gym. Then we have the kids go to each side of the court. "May the best class win." I said to Shadow. He nodded and said, "3, 2, 1, GO!" The countdown is a bit too fast, but the kids understood that the game has begun.

Lamar ran to the middle first and grabbed the dodge-ball. "Yo, it's time to pay the piper!" Lamar yelled. He threw a dodge-ball at one of the younger kids. That kid got hit by the dodge-ball. "OW! THAT'S NOT FAIR!" The kid said. "Deal with it." Lamar said as he took out the sunglasses and put it on. "What is this kid trying to do?" Shadow asked. "He thinks he's too cool for school. However, he's actually being a poser." I answered. Shadow chuckled like a bull.

After that, here's how most of the match went: Brandon gets hit by the dodge-ball because he's the big target, Carrie got hit by the dodge-ball because she wasn't trying at all, Danny lost because he's a nerd, Juliet lost because she's more focused on being dramatic than playing the game, Felix lost because he's happy to get hit by the ball, Wanda lost because she left the game out of indignation, Nancy lost because she would rather play video games than play dodge-ball, Randy lost because he didn't pay attention to where the dodge-ball gets thrown, and I placed Mary in time-out because she's distracting everyone by dodging every ball thrown at her.

Lamar is surprisingly the athletic kid of the bunch. He took every opponent out except for the athletic kid. The athletic kid threw a dodge-ball at Lamar and Lamar threw a dodge-ball back at the kid and the dodge-balls both hit each other. "What? Is this really how it ends? A tie?" Shadow asked incredulously. "Hey, at least a tie is better than a loss." I explained. "Yeah, I guess so..." Shadow said. Hmm... I wonder how Shadow's class is like. "Hey, Shadow, how is it like being a teacher?" I asked. "It was stressful! These kids are more interested in breaking windows than learning about science! And it's all the old man's fault!" Shadow shouted. "Wow. Waluigi sure is stupid." I commented. Shadow agreed.

After this exchange, I led the kids back to our classroom. It's time to teach the kids about one topic! And I know exactly which topic to teach...

"Kids, I'm going to teach you about adjectives!" I exclaimed. The kids looked confused. "What's an adjective? Is it pizza?" Brandon asked. "NO! Adjectives are something that describes someone. Like hungry, for example." I explained. The kids nodded understandingly, but Felix said, "Umm, sir? This is way too complicated for me. Can we go back to the basics, please?"

I groaned and decided to teach colors. "An apple is red. A cone is orange. A banana is yellow. Grass is green. Water is blue. And grapes are purple. Anyone got that?" I asked. The kids said yes, but Felix said, "This is way too colorful. And it's too complicated. Can you teach something simpler?"

I sighed hard and decided to teach the alphabet. "A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z! Did anyone get that?" I asked. The kids nodded, but once again Felix said, "There's too many letters to remember! And it's still too complicated. Can you teach simpler stuff?"

I groaned in frustration and decided to teach something that can't be simpler than that: Numbers. "1, 2 ,3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10! Did EVERYONE get it this time?" I asked in a harsh tone. Everyone nodded, including Felix. Thank goodness. I felt worn out and I decided that it's time for the kids to play with their toys. "WAHAHAHA! YOU WILL NEVER BE A GREAT TEACHER!" Waluigi screamed through the intercom. Ugh. I forgot that Waluigi screams like a monkey on steroids.

Anyways, I found out about some secrets about the kids. How? By watching them play with their toys. For example, Wanda is a very sophisticated individual, but when she plays with her tea party kit, you'll find out that she enjoys it very much. So much that she's playing with it like a normal little girl. And it's not just Wanda. Everyone else in this room plays toys like a normal little kid. "Are you guys enjoying your toys?" I asked. The kids looked at me and said, "Yes, teacher." I nodded. I think there's something about those kids that are pretty normal. I think Waluigi has something to do with this.

"Kids, I'll be right back." I said as I walked out of the classroom. I walked to the principal's office, and when I got there, Waluigi is sitting in his chair, looking all smug. "ENJOYING YOUR JOB?! WAHAHAHA, I GUESS NOT!" Waluigi bellowed. "Waluigi, what's really going on here?" I asked.

"BWAHAHAHA! WELL, AFTER I BECAME PRINCIPAL AND BUILT THIS SCHOOL, I ASKED PARENTS TO ENROLL THEIR KIDS TO MY SCHOOL! AFTER THEY WALKED INTO MY OFFICE, I DID A SECRET DANCE THAT GAVE THE KIDS RANDOM PERSONALITIES! AFTER THAT, I SENT THEM TO THEIR CLASSROOMS SO THEY CAN WAIT FOR THEIR NEW TEACHER! AND THAT WOULD BE YOU AND SHADOW! WAHAHAHA!" Waluigi explained loudly.

I can't believe this. So Waluigi is actually behind all of this? So the kids' quirky personalities aren't natural? "Waluigi, I never hated you more than I do now." I said in a harsh tone. "TOO BAD YOU CAN'T FIRE ME!" Waluigi screamed. I sighed in defeat until I noticed Waluigi's principal license on the wall. I looked at the expiration date. It turns out that the license expired in 1901. That means Waluigi uses the license that has been expired for 116 years. And somehow, the school board didn't notice...

I got up, walked to the wall, and took the license down. "HEY! THAT'S MY LICENSE!" Waluigi yelled. "Waluigi, you're using an expired license. I'm going to show this to the school board and I'm going to get you fired, Waluigi." I said. Waluigi looked shocked. "OH NO YOU DON'T!" Waluigi shouted.

I ran out of the office with license in hand. Waluigi pressed the button on the wall and a metallic door slammed shut in front of the school entrance. There's a pass-code in front of the entrance. "WAHAHA! YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHAT THE CODE IS!" Waluigi hollered.

I thought about it for a minute. What could be the pass-code for this school? Then I thought of the answer. I typed in '1234'. The metallic door opened up and I ran out of the school. The guard dogs are guarding the front of the school. They looked at me and they barked loudly, as if it's going to intimidate me. I asked the dogs an age old question. "What's 9+10?" I quizzed. The dogs looked puzzled and they ran away from the entrance. Huh. I didn't expect them to run away quickly.

Afterwards, I ran out of the front of the school and ran to the school board building, which is next door to Waluigi's school. Once I entered the building, the secretary looked at me and said, "Do you have an appointment?"

"Well, I found an expired principal license. The principal should get fired." I answered. "Oh, that's really common these days. Let me take you to the head of the school board." The secretary said. Wait, people keep using expired licenses? What is going on with this world?

Anyways, the secretary got up and walked to the head of the school board's office. I followed her to the office. Once we entered the office, I saw that the head of the school board is playing with his iPhone. "Umm... Sir?" I asked. The head of the school board looked at me and turned off his iPhone frantically so he can look as (un)professional as possible. "What can I do for you, young man? By the way, call me Leader." Leader said.

"Okay, well, I found an expired principal license from Waluigi. Can you fire him?" I asked. Leader thought it over and then said, "Okay, let me inspect it." I gave the license to Leader and he looked it over.

Waluigi came in a minute later and said, "THE LICENSE ISN'T EXPIRED! IT'S STILL IN USE!" "You're the worst liar ever. I checked the license and it expired 116 years ago. You're fired, Waluigi." Leader proclaimed. "WHAT?! HOW?!" Waluigi yelled. "For using an expired license. Not to mention that you hypnotized children and you lured teenagers to hire them as permanent teachers. That's so despicable of you." Leader answered. "WELL, FINE! BEING A PRINCIPAL IS BORING ANYWAYS! AND SONIC, I'LL GET YOU NEXT TIME!" Waluigi screamed as he ran out of the office while screaming like a little girl.

"Thanks, Leader." I said. "No problem, kiddo. By the way, the reason we didn't fire Waluigi sooner is that it's too easy to fire someone with an expired license. We were just waiting for someone to complain about it." Leader explained. I looked at him like he's crazy, but I said, "Well, okay. Bye."

I ran out of the building and ran back to the school. I looked at the kids exiting the school. I found my group of kids and said, "Hey, guys. Are you all right now?" "Yes, sir. We are all right. We're just on our way home now, yo." Lamar answered. "Okay. Oh, by the way, no matter how hard life is, always be yourself." I said. The kids looked at me as if I'm weird, but they shrugged and walked back to their homes.

I smiled and jogged to my house. During the jog, I thought about how this whole day went. It was actually kind of...fun. It was an experience I'll never forget, but next time, I'm going to check if some employer's license is expired or not beforehand.

After I walked inside my house, Tails ran to the entrance. "Sonic! Thank goodness you're here! You haven't answered my communication calls!" Tails exclaimed. "So? Is that a big deal?" I inquired. "YES! I was so worried about you!" Tails said. "Hey, you're not my mom. You're my little brother." I replied. "Whatever. All I'm saying is that I'm glad you're safe." Tails said.

I smiled and said, "Thanks, bro." "No problem! Oh, and by the way, I have a joke for you. Why did the dumb chicken cross the road?" Tails said. I sighed and said, "I take back my thanks. The dumb chicken crossed the road because it wants to flunk out of school." "Seriously? How did you know about these jokes?" Tails asked incredulously. "I knew the jokes because they're WAY too obvious." I said as I walked up the stairs. Tails looked at me as if I have two heads, but he shrugged and walked up the stairs too.


	7. Preparation Conundrum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's almost time for the start of the new school year, so, of course, Smart Sonic and Smart Tails must get ready for the year before it's too late! If only the obstacles would ever stop being increasingly ridiculous.

One day, I'm just walking down the sidewalk, looking at all the sights in my hometown. The sights are very beautiful, to say the least. After looking at nature, I looked at some of the store signs. (The shoe store sign always has the cool artwork, making the other store signs look like garbage.) When I looked at the last store sign on the block, everything stops to a halt and there's a record scratching noise. Or at least that's what it felt like. Why? Well, it's because I'm looking at the back-to-school sale sign. I can't believe that the first day of school is coming so soon. I mean, where did the time go?

Once I got over the shock, I ran all the way back to my house (It's pretty amazing how fast I can run sometimes.), and once I ran through the open door (I should have taught Tails to leave the door closed whenever he enters or leaves the house.), I shouted, " **TAILS!** " Tails must have been startled because I heard a scream, and a sound of an explosion. (One has to wonder what Tails is even making this time.) Then Tails walked down the stairs and I see that he is covered in smoke.

"Dude, I was practicing chemistry in my room and you messed up my concentration!" Tails shouted. I cringed from Tails' shouting and said, "Bro, the first day of school is already coming!" "I already knew that. The reason I was practicing chemistry in the first place is because I'm going to have chemistry class this year." Tails answered. _Oh wow, Tails knew this already? Maybe he checked the school's website._ I thought. Then I said, "Well, aren't you concerned that time could be messed up or something?" "No, it's that you never bothered to check your calendar." Tails replied. I face-palmed. Tails was right. I was too focused on reading and playing video games to check what the day is.

I sighed and said, "Well, you know what time it is." "Is it back-to-school shopping time?" Tails guessed. "You guessed it. Before we do that, though..." I said.

 **A FEW MINUTES LATER**...

I set up the high diving board and I climbed up the ladder leading to it. Tails and I made the high diving board board (some assembly required) and I dragged the kiddie pool under the diving board. Once I climbed up the ladder, I looked down at Tails and said, "You're recording this, right?" Tails nodded as he held the camera up. Then I jumped on the diving board two times until I jumped out into the kiddie pool. I made a semi-big splash and Tails is amazed at this. Then we started laughing for a few seconds until boredom rears its ugly head. "This isn't quite as fun as we thought." I said. "Yeah... Let's start the dreaded shopping now." Tails said.

**SEVERAL MINUTES LATER...**

After drying off, I walked out of the house along with Tails, ready to do some boring shopping. We walked back to the same place where I saw the back-to-school sale store sign. "Okay, so they're selling cool shoes here." I said as we walked into the shoe store. I looked at the cyan shoes that are on the bargain box. "Ooh, these shoes are so cool!" I gushed. "Of course you'll say that. Those shoes has your favorite color." Tails groaned, but he saw orange shoes on the same bargain box. "Wow! These shoes are awesome!" Tails exclaimed. Tails is being really hypocritical here.

After that, I looked at the price tag that has been attached to the cyan shoes. "100 dollars?! I thought this was called a 'bargain box', not a 'rip-off box'!" I said disdainfully. Tails got the similar reaction to the price of the orange shoes. "200 dollars?! I guess orange is more popular than cyan..." Tails said. I glared at Tails and said, " **NO, IT'S NOT!** Blue is the most popular color in the world, which means cyan is more popular than orange! Besides, men and women alike increasingly dislike orange as they age!" "Oh, whatever!" Tails said as he rolled his eyes. Then I looked at the male cashier and said, "Sir, why are there some expensive shoes in the bargain box?!" "Because some trouble making teenagers love to throw expensive shows around." The cashier nonchalantly explained.

 _These teenagers would throw expensive shoes around rather than wear them? Geez, it seems that we live in a crazy world._ I thought. "Okay, sir. What else is in the bargain box?" I asked. "There are only brown shoes that cost 10 dollars." The cashier answered. "...You can't be serious." I said in a deadpan way. "Would you rather waste all your money on something you barely use and therefore, you'll end up in financial ruin?" The cashier inquired. I looked at the cashier as if he just did a back-flip from a cliff into a river. (In other words, I couldn't believe what the cashier just said.) "...Fine. Brown shoes it is." I said as I took out 10 dollars to buy the blandest pair of shoes in the universe. Tails did the same since he has no choice. He wants to save his money too. After this, we walked out of the shoe store while holding a shoe box that contains the brown shoes. "One has to wonder on how the employees could say that. Did the boss told them to say that?" I questioned. "Probably. Honestly, it's not a good business strategy. These guys should stick to shooting commercials." Tails answered. "Yeah... They should have thought harder." I said.

**3 MINUTES LATER...**

We arrived at the mall, which is the mother-lode of back-to-school items. Once we entered the mall, we saw sale signs in front of practically every store in the mall. _Whoa... Talk about advertisement overload._ I thought. Then we literally ran into Amy. (Figures... Of course Amy is shopping at the mall.) We both fell down while Amy drops some shopping bags. Once we got up from the floor (and after we got over the dizziness from falling), I said, "Are you all right, Amy?" Amy looked at me and said, "Yeah, I'm alright. Just make sure you watch where you are going next time, okay?"

Tails and I nodded, and Amy picked up the shopping bags and ran off. (Wait, why is she still running after she just bumped into someone? I guess she just forgot.) After that, Tails and I wanted to go to the school supplies store, so we can get, well, school supplies so we can be done with back-to-school shopping and be ready for school. The problem is, we have to walk with through the food court in order to get to the school supplies store. You may be wondering: How is that a problem?

Well, first of all, the food here is really great so therefore, we could end up forgetting about the real reason we came to this mall, thanks to the great food at the food court. Second of all, they have a sale at the food court too, so we could end up being stuck here for hours, thanks to the sales.

So Tails and I made up a simple plan, which is just walking through the food court as fast as we can.

Once we entered the food court, we walked fast, trying to find an exit. The thing is, the food court is like a modern labyrinth. We have to walk through a maze of people (who apparently loves food so much that they stood around the food court as if they want to be our obstacles in a labyrinth) and we have to ignore the distracting food offers.

During the walk, we saw one guy throw up after he ate one too many tacos. Thanks to that, ignoring food offers is easier than I thought. Unfortunately, the food police arrived. "Oh no... Not the food police." I groaned. "How is that a bad thing? The food police only arrives when someone threw up and they always bring delicious food with them... Oh." Tails said. "Yep. The delicious food is gonna distract us from the back-to-school mission." I said.

The food police walked to the person who threw up and said, "Let me see your Lunch ID." The sick person handed them the Lunch ID and the food police inspected the ID and looked back at the sick person. Then they took out the handcuffs (The food police's handcuffs are made out of every food imaginable. I can't tell you exactly what they're made out of or otherwise it'll be the longest paragraph you have ever read.) and they strapped it to the sick guy's hands. "You're under arrest for throwing up in the food court, Troy. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or throw up can and will be used against you in a food court of mall law." The first food police officer said. I have a feeling that I have heard this phrase somewhere...

"Guys, I'm just innocent!" Troy said. "If you were innocent, then how come you threw up? Food should stay in your stomach and digest, not being thrown out of the mouth! We're going to interrogate you at the broom closet!" The second food police officer said as the rest of the food police officers dragged Troy to the aforementioned broom closet, which happens to be near the taco booth. The third food police officer accidentally dropped the cherry pie while they're dragging Troy to the food closet.

Tails and I couldn't believe our eyes after seeing that nonsensical commotion. "Sonic, is it just me or are we in the middle of a Cops episode?" Tails questioned. "Nah, I think we just witnessed the cosplayers being the police wannabe team. And apparently, the cosplayers are also obsessed with food." I answered. Then we noticed the cherry pie on the floor. It obviously looked very scrumptious. "Hmm...I suddenly feel like eating this pie." I said. "Sonic, remember that we're trying to get back-to-school stuff. Do not let the pie distract you. Besides, the five second rule has passed." Tails warned. "Aww, just one bite? Also, the janitor at the mall cleans the floors really good." I begged. Tails sighed and said, "Fine. We only have to eat one bite of the pie even though it looks so appetizing..."

Needless to say, we each took one bite of the cherry pie. The taste of the cherry pie is so sweet that I felt as if no other food can taste better than this. (Well, except for pizza and macaroni and cheese.) I'm pretty sure Tails felt the same way. After that, we DEVOURED the whole pie. We couldn't get enough of delicious food, so we ran around the food court, ordering every food from every food booth. (Every food in the food court is free thanks to the back-to-school sale.) Every food booth owner looked at us strangely, but we're too greedy to care. Knuckles watched the whole thing. "Gee, and I thought I love food too much!" Knuckles said to himself. We gobbled almost every food until the food booth owner bans us from their booth. Then Tails and I just sat down at the table and talked about every strange thought we had in our entire lives. (For example: Do monkeys suck on their thumbs?) This goes on for some time until we conked out on the table.

**6 HOURS LATER...**

Tails and I talked for one hour and we slept for 5 hours. After we woke up, we couldn't believe that it's already night. We also couldn't believe that some mall cop didn't wake us up to escort us out of the mall. "Well, I guess now is the good time to get school supplies, huh?" I said. Tails nodded in agreement and we walked to the exit of the food court.

After we finally got out of the food court, we walked straight to the school supplies store. The bad news is that the mall cop is patrolling around the entrance. _Oh, so now the mall cop is doing his job._ I thought. "How are we gonna get through this guy?" Tails wondered. The mall cop suddenly collapsed. Tails and I gasped in surprise because we don't even know what caused the mall cop to collapse. Shadow was behind the mall cop and he had karate chopped the mall cop's back.

"Shadow, you have watched one too many karate movies, you know that?" I said after I got over the initial shock. "Heh, I just can't wait for our academic competition, Sonic. And I need to get prepared in order to win in that competition. Besides, I fell for the same food court trap." Shadow explained. Then he ran to the inside of the school supplies store. Tails and I did the same.

Once we're inside, we went to the notebook aisle. Shadow can't decide whether he should choose the red notebook or the black notebook. Tails and I simply chose the orange and blue notebooks, respectively. "Shadow, just hurry up and choose the notebook already!" I said in frustration. "Be quiet, Sonic! I need to decide which notebook is the lucky one." Shadow said. I face-palmed while Tails groaned in boredom. I have never thought shopping could be this boring until now.

After Shadow finally picks the notebook (It's the black notebook in case you guys are wondering.), we walked to the pencil and pens aisle. We just chose some pencils and pens. It's as simple as that. What's not so simple however, is that the mall cop regained consciousness and he spotted us once we walked out of the pencil and pens aisle.

"HEY YOU! STOP STEALING SUPPLIES OR ELSE I'LL USE BRUTE FORCE!" The mall cop yelled. "Yeah, right. The only 'brute force' you have is the flashlight." Shadow said sarcastically. "Besides, we're not stealing. We're going to pay for our supplies." I said. "Umm, guys? The mall cop is about to run after us. We should run away." Tails said. We looked to see that the mall cop has gotten closer. Thankfully, the mall cop has apparently ate one too many donuts because he has slow running speed. (The mall cop is definitely not helping with the 'cops love donuts' stereotype.)

Shadow, Tails, and I ran to the next aisle where the mall cop couldn't see us. (Somehow.) The mall cop grunted in frustration and he said, "Backup! I need backup! I'm too slow!"

Meanwhile, Shadow, Tails, and I looked around. It turns out that we're in a folder aisle. We looked around for a perfect folder. I obviously chose the blue one, and Shadow got the black one. Surprisingly, Tails chose the green folder. Tails looked at my shocked face and he said, "What? My school supplies just need a little variety in the color department." "Oh okay." I said after hearing Tails' reason.

Unfortunately, two big mall cops blocked both aisle's exits. "Geez, when did the mall cops get smart all of a sudden?" Shadow asked incredulously. Before we knew it, we got cornered. _Well then. Looks like my permanent record is gonna take a big hit after this._ I thought.

Before the mall cops can catch us though, the food police officers ran through the aisle's entrance and they tackled the two mall cops. "This is the food police and you're under arrest for spitting out those jelly-filled donuts!" The first food police officer said. "How am I under arrest? I should arrest you all for staying in the mall after it closes." The first mall cop said. "Oh no you don't!" The second food police officer said. Shortly after that, a huge fight ensued between the food police officers and the mall cops. 

"Let's get out of here while we still can." Tails said. Shadow and I silently agreed. We walked out of the folder aisle and we walked out of the school supplies store, but not before we left some money on the front store counter. After we got out of the mall, Shadow said, "Well, it has been a fun adventure and all, but I gotta get home now. See you at school, rival." Shadow said before he ran off to his home. After that, I looked at Tails and said, "So, you're ready for school, bro?" "I'm 100% ready, Sonic." Tails said. "That's good to hear." I said while smiling.

Then we walked to our home. During the walk, Tails said, "So, do you think the school year will be great this year?" "Well, as long as we're ready for anything, this year will be great." I answered. Tails smiled after hearing this advice and the rest of the walk is peaceful and quiet. This preparation adventure may have been hectic, but at least it prepared us for the impending school year. And this time, we're ready for it.


	8. A Belated Walk Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ooh, there's a new ice cream shop that is set to release today! ...At the edge of the town. The walk back home is going to be real hectic, isn't it?

The clock ticks slowly as I'm waiting for the last class period to end. My friends and I went through all seven class periods and we did all the assignments for today. So all we had to do was just to wait for 3:00, which is very close at this point, and we'll be going home.

I looked back at the clock and it's still 2:58. Don't you hate it that when you can't wait for the day to be over, the clock seems to slow down? I looked around the room. Tails is working on his latest invention, which almost looks like Omochao, but with thicker armor and a red color scheme. Let's hope that it doesn't spout off obvious facts. Knuckles is arm-wrestling with...himself. I don't know how he managed to do that, but he did it anyways. Hey, they call him Knuckles, unlike me, he doesn't follow logic. Amy is just simply reading her book. I bet that book is about multiplying and dividing pies. Shadow is writing something on his paper. He's probably writing about plans on how to beat me academically. Silver is just twirling his pencil around with his psychokinesis. I guess the boredom really got to him, I guess.

All of a sudden, the bell rung and I looked at the clock. It's 3:00. Huh, I guess time flies when you're being observational. We all walked out of the classroom and the school. Shadow, Silver, Amy, Knuckles, Tails, and I stood outside, waiting for our bus to come. Knuckles was looking through his phone and he said, "Guys, a new ice cream shop just opened on the edge of the town!" We all looked at him in a mix of curiosity and excitement and Tails replied, "Awesome! I wonder if this shop sells new ice cream flavors." Silver shrugged and said, "Who knows? Let's go check it out!" I nodded with agreement and said, "Hopefully, the cookies and cream flavor is available there. You can't beat the classics, after all."

"You know, it's kinda suspicious that it's on the edge of the town. Luckily, I came prepared for suspicious stuff like this." Amy said as she took out her pepper spray out of her backpack and showed it to us. "Make that crazy prepared." I commented while others just looked at her in disbelief. Shadow just looked away from us and said, "Hmph! I wouldn't waste time eating ice cream. That sounds like the most pointless thing to do. I would just go home and study." We looked at Shadow with no surprise. Of course he'll act like that. It seems like all he cares about is academics. "...Suit yourself. Let's go, guys." I said as we walked away from Shadow. When we're about to walk out of his sight, I looked back at Shadow one last time and it seems like he's looking at his phone. I wonder what he's looking at...

**A COUPLE HOURS LATER...**

We were still walking on the path to the new ice cream shop when the sun starts to set. "Man, the edge of the town is so far away!" Silver said. "You can say that again." I replied. "Man, the edge of the town is so far away!" Silver repeated. I face palmed while Tails said, "He didn't mean that literally, Silver." Silver smiled mischievously while he said, "I know. I'm just messing around." Knuckles and Amy chuckled. "Oh wow." Amy said after she stopped chuckling. Huh. Seems like unlike Knuckles and Amy, Tails and I didn't chuckle.

At that point, the sunset has been finished and the night sky is slowly starting to replace it. (That sentence sounds like it could be a plot for a dramatic movie filled with day cycle angst.) The new ice cream shop came to our view and we gasped in awe. "Well, this is the place!" Knuckles said. We read the shop sign.

**START OF SHOP SIGN SUMMARY**

Welcome to the Creatively Delicious Sweets! We make every delicious ice cream flavor here! If you don't like any of them, then you must be an alien. Anyways, we're open 24/7! I hope you enjoy the ice cream here...or else.

P.S. If you get triggered by the "alien" insult, then your ego is too big.

P.P.S If you don't like any of the ice cream flavors here, well, you're in big trouble.

**END OF SHOP SIGN SUMMARY**

"...Okay then. Sounds like someone has issues." I said while everyone else looks shocked. After the shock wore off, we decided to go inside. The decorations in this ice cream shop are all pink, which is normal for an ice cream shop. Then we looked at the ice cream display. After seeing the delicious choices, we squealed like a little child who has lots of presents for Christmas. We rushed to look at our favorite flavors. "Cookies and cream!" I yelled. "Chocolate!" Tails screamed. "Vanilla!" Knuckles exclaimed at the woman who is a mother of a young child. After realizing what he did, Knuckles looked sheepishly at the woman and said, "Sorry." Then he turned around and looked at the ice cream flavor. "Vanilla!" He exclaimed again. "Mint!" Amy squealed. "Pizza!" Silver shouted. We all looked weirdly at Silver. "What? It's a flavor here!" Silver said defensively. We all shrugged as I said, "All right, enough with the favorite flavor roll call. Let's go get some ice cream!" "Yeah!" They all said.

After that, we ordered our favorite flavors. The worker just nodded and scooped up the ice cream pretty quickly. In a matter of minutes, all of our ice cream are in bowls. We took each bowl and we thanked the worker. "You're welcome. Enjoy your ice cream." The worker said in a rather emotionless tone. We were kinda taken aback by that tone because he almost sounded robotic, but we were more focused on the ice cream. We sat down at the table and we simply enjoyed our ice cream. Silver didn't take any bite of his ice cream yet. He's probably preparing himself to do so by silently chanting, "It IS use, it IS use, it IS use..."

A few minutes later, we ate all of our ice cream, except Silver. The worker came to our table. "Did you enjoy the ice cream?" He asked in the same emotionless tone. "Yes, we did." Amy answered in the same dull tone. Silly much, Amy? We laughed while Silver finally took a bite of his pizza ice cream. The worker seems unfazed by the whole joke. When Silver finally got the taste of the pizza ice cream, he nearly gagged. The worker suddenly turned to look at Silver. "What did I just hear from you?" The worker said in a noticeable angry tone. Silver was still cringing from the taste as he said, "This is the worst ice cream flavor I had ever eaten. I only chose this flavor because pizza is my favorite food. This ice cream is good on paper, but the execution was the worst."

The worker suddenly looked angry after hearing Silver's critique. "THAT'S IT! I'M TELLING MY MANAGER!" The worker screamed. "Oh no you don't!" Amy replied as she took out her pepper spray and sprayed it on the worker's face. The worker screamed with agony as he ran around the shop. While this chaos is happening, he suddenly glitches out and he's replaced with a metallic orange robot. We felt nothing but surprise after witnessing this. After a few seconds of silence, Tails said, "Wait, so this worker is the robot in holo-disguise?! Gee, what kind of crazy world do we live in?" I looked at Tails in a deadpan way as I answered, "Welcome to the real world, Tails."

The robot ran off into the manager's office. We felt a little worried because if the workers are actually robots, then the manager must have been worse, right? After that realization, we decided to get up and hide in a not-so-cold freezer room. A few minutes later, we heard a door getting smashed down and huge footsteps. "These people had better not insult us ever again!" A terrifying robotic voice said. "How did we even insult them?" Knuckles whispered. "All I did was complain about the terrible quality of a pizza ice cream and this is what happens?" Silver whispered back incredulously. I shrugged as I whispered, "So robots do have emotions, after all..."

The freezer door suddenly got smashed down and we looked dumbfounded as we saw a huge red robot on the doorway. "You gotta be kidding me..." I said as we backed away into the wall. The red robot got a little closer and Amy used more pepper spray on the robot. It reacted with a little shock and then it felt relieved. "Muy calienté. I love pepper. I would like to eat more after I capture you!" The malicious robot said. We were about to accept out fate when the robot suddenly broke into pieces and fell down. We saw Shadow standing behind the rubble. "Shadow? What are you doing here? I thought you said that you weren't going to come here." I said in a surprised tone. Shadow shrugged as he answered, "I wasn't going to come here until I found out that the rainbow ice cream flavor is on the menu."

We stared at Shadow in disbelief. "Wow. Turns out that Shadow likes the most colorful ice cream in the world. Who would have thunk it?" Amy said. "Let's just get out of here and go home." Tails replied. We all nodded in agreement as we leave the freezer and the shop, but not before we heard the robot say, "Requesting...backup...NOW!" Shadow also took the rainbow ice cream before going out, but that's minor compared to what we just heard.

Once we're outside, Tails said, "Well, I'm glad that we're finally out of that situation. Anyways, I added the finishing touches to my latest invention while we're at the table. Here it is!" He threw the red, armored Omochao look-alike into the air and it started to fly around and hover next to Tails. "I call it, 'Womochao'. Womochao, can you tell us one of your facts?" Womochao lit up and it said, "Hey, did you know that evaporation, condensation, and precipitation all play the part in making rainy days happen? We can thank these factors for ruining people's vacation plans." We all looked at Womochao in awe after we heard that. It turns out that this Omochao copy actually says smart facts instead of obvious ones. That's what I call a refreshing change of pace.

"Whoa... I like this new invention of yours, bro. This is one of the best." I complimented. "Yeah... This invention actually made me resist an urge to destroy an Omochao." Shadow commented. "I think you should give that invention to some advanced research center or something, Tails. That's some excellent invention you just made." Amy replied. "That thing is cool. That is all." Silver said. "Smart robots!? Wow, what won't they think of next? Toasters that can actually shoot out the toast instead of just getting stuck in there? Water that isn't actually wet?" Knuckles said. "Umm... That's pretty implausible, Knuckles." I answered. Knuckles just shrugged as we walked on the path back to home.

When we walked in through the entrance of our town though, we saw a group of six robots standing in the entrance of the plaza. A much larger black robot is standing behind them. We stared at them in disbelief as they looked at us. "Ugh, you gotta be kidding me..." Shadow groaned. The robots walked a little closer to us. Once we got a better look at them, it turns out that these group of robots are very colorful. The six robots pretty much have the colors of the rainbow. However, the larger robot doesn't have any color at all. I bet it's the most serious robot of the group.

The larger robot scoffed as it looked at us. "Hmph! Looks like we have found some troublemakers... I'm going to let you know who you're dealing with here. I'm Gerald, the serious one, as you can tell. These six robots are all under my command. The angry red robot is named Wallace." Gerald said. "I'M GOING TO DESTROY ALL OF YOU AND YOUR ICE CREAM!" Wallace shouted. "The self-conscious orange robot is named Bobby." Gerald continued. "I don't know if people will think that I'm a wimp for using weak weapons or a maniac for using overpowered weapons..." Bobby said uncertainly. "The happy yellow robot is named Jerry." Gerald explained. "Hi there! I hope we have a nice battle!" Jerry cheerfully exclaimed. "The sarcastic green robot is named David." Gerald answered. "Oh great. As if we needed you to introduce us to more people over and over again." David retorted. Gerald looked a little offended. "Why you little! Ahem. Anyways, the mellow blue robot is called Lance." Gerald replied. "What's up, dudes?" Lance greeted.

Gerald looked over at the last robot in the group as it said, "This purple robot is a bit of a...wild card. His name is Brainstorm. We don't know exactly which personality he has." Brainstorm looked a little resigned as it said, "Umm... Okay then. I guess we're gonna battle them now?" This is starting to get a little ridiculous. "See? Wooooh, it's so mysterious!" Gerald exclaimed in a rather silly way. Which is strange to me because, isn't Gerald supposed to be stoic, according to him? And apparently, I'm not the only one who noticed this. "Wait a minute... Aren't you supposed to be the serious one in this group?" Knuckles questioned. "Yeah... It feels like I'm the real serious person here." Shadow replied.

Gerald has a really flustered look on his face as its head steamed like a boiling teapot. "I AM THE SERIOUS ONE HERE! **ROBOT SQUAD, DEFEAT AND CAPTURE THEM!** " Gerald screamed at the top of his lungs. "YES, SIR!" The whole squad (except Brainstorm) said. The robots rushed at us and we decided that now is the good time to move. We swiftly moved out of the way of the robot's grabbing hands and we ran past them. They chased after us as we made it to downtown. "SLOW DOWN AND MAYBE YOUR BEAT-DOWN MIGHT BE LESS PAINFUL!" Wallace screamed after us. "How about no?" Amy retorted. Then we ran inside the warehouse, which is abandoned. (Aren't they all? Well, maybe not all of them. It's still a cliché though...)

Once we're inside, we looked for good hiding spots. It's very dark in there...too dark. At that point, Amy coincidentally took 6 flashlights out of her backpack and gave 5 of them to us. ("Okay, how do you have this many flashlights?" Shadow asked in disbelief. "I have an extended family who's afraid of the dark." Amy answered rather nonchalantly.) Then we split up and we quickly found our hiding spots. It's at this point that we heard metallic footsteps enter the warehouse. "Oh no... The dark is gonna make me look like a freak." Bobby said in a worried tone. "Like you already are?" David snapped. "Chill, dudes. Let's just find them." Lance replied. Then I hear more metallic footsteps.

A few minutes later, I heard some sort of commotion. "Now that I finally found you, you're going to have a nice time riding in my arms." Jerry said. "Stand back before you face the wrath of Womochao!" Tails threatened. _Oh boy... This is not going to end well._ I thought. "Hi there, I'm Womochao! Did you know that Henry Ford invented automobiles?" Womochao said. I heard Jerry laugh as it said, "These useless facts sure put a smile on my face." Womochao growled as it said, "These facts aren't useless! You want a piece of this?!" Then I heard a metallic bump and thud. Judging by those sounds, I'm guessing that Womochao has bumped into Jerry with its thick armor and it made Jerry fall down. "Requesting backup! Please send the rest of the squad over to these coordinates. Have a nice day!" Jerry reported. I heard more metallic footsteps running to Tails' hiding place. "Oh no! We have to assist Tails!" Amy cried out. I assumed that they agree since I heard frantic footsteps running to where Tails is. I was about to run over there too, but once I ran out of my hiding spot, I accidentally ran into Brainstorm.

"Ow!" I exclaimed as I quickly got up while rubbing my head in pain. Brainstorm looked at me and sighed in resignation as it said, "I guess I have to capture you now..." This robot sounds like it's not enjoying its job. "Whoa, whoa, whoa! You do realize that the reason this whole geese chase happened is because someone couldn't take Silver's criticism of an unusual ice cream flavor." I explained. "I know, right?! These guys go after people for the most pettiness of reasons." Brainstorm said. Wow. I have no idea that Brainstorm actually has the most common sense out of the whole squad. Not that there's any competition for that title. "Well, anyways, I'm gonna go help Tails now." I told Brainstorm as I ran off to where Tails is.

When I got to Tails' hiding spot though, I looked around and see that nobody was around. I was about to leave that hiding spot when I suddenly got electrocuted by David's electric laser. I fell down to the ground and I slowly lost consciousness. During this misfortune, I heard David say, "Huh. If only it was that easy to take constructive criticism like a rational person." Brainstorm groaned as it said, "That's what I've been telling you!" David growled as it said, "Shut up and grab that blue person!" _A blue person?! This robot has a nerve to call me a blue person?!_ I thought just as I finally lost all my consciousness.

**ONE HOUR LATER...**

I slowly woke up and looked around my surroundings. It looks like we're on the grassy plains with my home neighborhood in the distance. Not only that, but we're also in front of an entrance of their secret base. I looked around some more and saw my friends being held tightly in the Robot Squad's arms, one by one. Then I looked at myself and realized that I'm in the same predicament. "Oh no... What's happening here?" I said once I regained my full consciousness. Gerald just looked back at me and said, "Oh, umm... I'm totally not struggling to open the secret base door with my key." I gave it a deadpan look as I said, "Yeah, right."

That's when Gerald's head started to steam like a teapot. He's either really angry or he's just boiling tea. "Why, you little!" Gerald began just as Bobby nudged it with its elbows. "Umm, you probably shouldn't finish that sentence, sir. There's old people watching this conversation. Not to mention children too." Bobby said. They turned to look at the old couple sitting on the porch of their own house, along with a little girl. "Hey, don't mind us. We're just enjoying this scene right there. Go ahead and continue your conversation." The old man said. "Please pass the popcorn, Homer." The old woman requested. "Okay, Marge." Homer obliged as he passed the popcorn to her, but he accidentally dropped it. The little girl grabbed some popcorn while Homer said, "D'oh!" Marge just face palmed. Jerry laughed at this whole scene.

Then the Robot Squad turned their attention back to me and my friends. At that point, my friends just woke up and they looked around. "What's going on here?" Knuckles asked. "This is quite a pickle we're in, guys. I bet they have that flavor in the ice cream shop too." Silver commented. "Bruh..." Shadow replied. Gerald looked at us as it said, "SILENCE!" That definitely stopped us from talking because he said that so loudly that you can put that as a jump-scare in a horror game and hardly anyone will bat an eye.

"Now, here's my plan. My plan is to do some research on you unusual human beings." Gerald said. "Research? I guess that doesn't sound too bad." Knuckles replied. "Of course, the research will be very dangerous for you. Not to me, though. I get to sit back and watch the fireworks." Gerald continued. "Wait, what?!" All of my friends said that. I just gulped in fear. "What do you mean by that?" Tails questioned. "Oh, I shouldn't say how exactly the research will go. The old people and child are still watching. It's that horrible." Gerald answered. At that point, that's when my friends started to struggle out of their restraints, to no avail. "Oh boy, this is starting to get even more interesting!" Homer said as he munched on the popcorn from the floor. Then he noticed where he ate the popcorn from and he looks at the perfect bucket of popcorn on the little girl's hands. "Why doesn't mine look like that?!" He exclaimed. Marge just sighed while she had an amused smile on her face.

Back to the matter at hand, is this the end for me and my friends? Of course not, because Brainstorm (the robot that was restraining me) let go of me and it said, "Okay, you went WAY too far now. You just crossed the line. Actually, no. The line was already crossed when you first attacked them, all because someone criticized your ice cream!" Silver just looked sheepishly at us after Brainstorm said that. "You guys are pretty much the definition of pettiness. You are so petty to the point that you don't even work as a team!" Brainstorm continued. "Oh, yes we do! After all, I'm the one who got the first capture! I should take the credit!" Jerry retorted. That was a big mistake on Jerry's part because Wallace said, "OH NO YOU DON'T! I DID ALL THE WORK AROUND HERE!" David scoffed as it said, "Is your brain a size of a green bean? I did the capturing here." Bobby gulped as it said, "If they're going to fight, then I should join in so I could show how strong I am." Tails gave Bobby a deadpan look. "I think you already proved that." Tails said as he struggles a little more.

Jerry, Wallace, David, and Bobby got into a fight, but not before releasing my friends in a process. That just left Lance, who's holding Shadow captive. "Come on, dudes. Why can't we chill?" Lance asked. "BECAUSE YOUR VOICE SOUNDS LIKE A MALFUNCTIONING KEN DOLL!" Wallace retorted. Lance just looked at Wallace and then it said in an eerily calm voice, "Oh, it's on." He ended up releasing Shadow before joining in the fight too. After that, my friends ran to my side while the robots (excluding Brainstorm) damaged themselves by fighting each other. After a few seconds, they exploded and only scrap metal is left in the spot. Gerald gasped as it looked at the wreckage. "How dare you! That was clever, but still!" Gerald growled. "Aww, thanks for the compliment, but we must destroy you now." I replied. Then my friends, Brainstorm and I leaped at Gerald and attacked it to the point that Gerald got reduced to scrap heap. "I'll get you next time, unusual people! I'll be more prepared! I'll be-" Gerald said before being cut off by the malfunctioning audio. "Hmph. Some boss you are." Brainstorm answered.

After this whole situation is over, we were walking to our neighborhood, and yes, Brainstorm is walking with us. "Guys, I'm sorry that I was part of this whole squad. I always thought that this whole squad was petty." Brainstorm apologized. "That's okay. You seem like a pretty chill person. Well, not as chill as Lance, but you know what I mean!" Tails replied. "I agree. You're the only robot in the whole squad who has common sense!" Amy added. "He's alright." Shadow answered. "Hey, you were awesome when you called the squad out on their flaws." Silver complimented. "Yeah, props to you, man!" Knuckles said. "Thanks, guys." Brainstorm said in a grateful tone. I looked back at Brainstorm and I said, "So, are we friends now, Brainstorm?" I raised my fist up for the fist bump. Brainstorm nodded as it fist bumped me. "Yeah. We're friends." It answered. My friends cheered (well, except Shadow, of course) as we continue to walk back to our homes.

When we reached our street, Tails looked at Brainstorm in concern as he said, "Wait, where are you gonna live?" Brainstorm replied, "Don't worry. I'll just live outside. We robots can survive the outside." Tails smiled as he said, "Sounds good to me. Oh wait, before you go, let me give you this." He took out one of his communicators from his backpack (who knows how many communicators are in his backpack) and he gave it to Brainstorm. "There! Now you can contact us when you need us! Or when you just feel like chatting." Tails said as he grinned. "Wow... You guys are already starting to become the best friends I ever had!" Brainstorm said while it had a happy expression. "No problem!" Tails answered. Then we walked to our house while Brainstorm went off to who knows where. "You know, that was some good thinking there, bro." I said to Tails. "Thanks, bro." Tails replied as we walked into our house. Tonight was the night I'll never forget. I learned a lesson today that friends come in all shapes and sizes. I also learned that you should do some research on the place before going there.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, that's definitely a pizza party that I'll never forget! Remember kids, never have pizza parties after 9:00 PM! You have been warned! Anyways, I hope you guys enjoyed this and I will be sure to upload more soon!


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